Of course, I’d do all the obvious things, such as getting a bigger house, a newer car, and quitting work, but beyond that, I have no interest in an extravagant lifestyle—or at least that’s what I tell myself.

By a bigger house, I mean one typical of upper-middle-class living. I’ve watched plenty of videos of people touring million-dollar mansions, and they all look too big, open, and sterile to me. I’ve seen cozier tiny homes than those. And by a newer car, I mean a 2017 model or so instead of the 2007 one I drive now.

Really, give me a nice cottage by the lake with some land and a big garage for all my tools and toys, and I’m all set. I much prefer the idea of “hidden wealth” over showing it off. I’m just kind of worried that I wouldn’t be able to live up to my own expectations if push comes to shove, and there’s really no way of testing that. Am I just kidding myself here?

I feel the same way about fame. Many people aspire to become successful YouTubers or such, but the idea of people recognizing me on the street sounds awful.

  • S_204@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    I know a guy who’s worth over 10 and probably closer to $50 million. He still lives in the same house that he did when he graduated university. He drives a 10-year-old car and his son who is one of my best friends drives the car that he had before that as a handme down.

    Some people flaunt it. Some people build it quietly.

    This gentleman that I know has bought both of his son’s houses cash so they have no mortgages. He owns a million dollar cottage on a beautiful Lake and another property on the panhandle in Florida. You would think that he’s on social security though if you just saw him bumbling about his yard.

    • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      People don’t really comprehend what being wealthy is like. We imagine the high-rollers table in Vegas, or sailing a yacht in some Caribbean paradise.

      Usually it just means being able to fix your car when it needs repairs. It means taking a vacation and splurging on dinner out without going into a lot of debt. It means hiring landscapers and house cleaners to do the upkeep that two-income families don’t have time to do. It means having kids without going completely bankrupt.

      It’s actually kind of sad that these things are not possible anymore if you aren’t rich.

      • S_204@lemm.ee
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        4 months ago

        That’s not wealthy though. That’s maybe well to do or upper middle class.

        Wealthy is your children not having a mortgage and also having a trust fund.

        • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          You might want to sit down, because you’re not going to believe what you have to earn to live the life I described. We’re talking top 2% of families.

          • S_204@lemm.ee
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            4 months ago

            I’m happy to admit that I live the life that you described. For the most part. Big house and a desirable neighborhood. Couple of six-figure jobs. Couple of nice cars, at least one warm vacation every year and another one to visit family. Kids educations will be fully funded by the time they’re 18. Registered savings accounts are nearly maxed out and will be by the end of this year. The house I grew up in was a single parent home that went through bankruptcy when I was a young teenager, so I’m quite familiar with the other end of the spectrum and I’m putting plans in place to avoid ever ending up there… While still not thinking twice about picking up $1,000 dinner, tap while out with friends for a celebration. Balance as possible if you’re willing to sacrifice some of the shiny things that people seem to want these days.

            I’m grateful for our fortunate position. When I look around I see people living lives quite a bit more extravagant than ours and I don’t quite understand it, but I’m more focused on building my family’s future. So I keep the blinders on and keep doing what seems to be working for us. I’d suggest more people do the same and that would involve spending less time on sites like this.

            • whoreticulture@lemmy.world
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              4 months ago

              You should still recognize that you are in the top 2%, and are wealthy. Poorer people look at what other people are spending money on because it’s unfair that so many people can’t afford the basics. You have to look around to understand the situation. You sound like you don’t other people looking at you… trying to downplay your weath as “well-to-do” or “upper middle class”, which we all know are euphemisms. It’s ridiculous that you would think of yourself as not wealthy, but also not think twice about a $1000 tab.

              • S_204@lemm.ee
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                4 months ago

                Nah man, redefining things doesn’t work at all. I’m not wealthy. I’m pretty firmly middle class based on just about every definition of middle class that’s available to any sociologist on this planet. People ignorantly seem to think that middle class is tied to your salary or household income which is not the case.

                I’ve got no problem with people seeing me living the life that I live. I grew up in a twice broken bankrupted household and I’m pretty damn proud of what my partner and I have been able to achieve. I live a pretty comfortable middle-class life and I try to help uplift the people around me so they can do the same.

                I look around me and I see people struggling to achieve the middle class lifestyle that I’m grateful that I have but the fact that parts of society are falling behind doesn’t by default make me wealthy. If I were wealthy I wouldn’t have a mortgage or a host of other things that are currently saddling me financially. The people who can be categorized as wealthy are those who don’t need to work for a living and whose capital sustains them.

                You might not agree with me but that doesn’t change. The facts are reality surrounding our individual financial situations.

                • whoreticulture@lemmy.world
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                  4 months ago

                  You are literally amongst the wealthiest people and are trying to create your own categories. Not working on me, and you barely seem like you’re convincing yourself.

                  • S_204@lemm.ee
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                    4 months ago

                    If I were wealthy I sincerely doubt I’d be driving my broken down Ford but you tell yourself whatever you gotta to alleviate your feelings of failure.