Caption: When you ask an Autistic person to do something, make sure to attach a timeframe like “today,” “or at 3 PM,” (avoiding demanding words like “now”) and a definite personalization of who needs to do the thing that is being suggested. If one or both of these things is missing from your request, we will not see them as a request, but a passive statement, and it will not get done.

Image: 2 panels with an alien speaking to a person. One panel is labeled “incorrect” and the other “correct”.

Incorrect: The alien’s statement is written in a bubble shaped like an arrow. It points from the alien’s mouth to the person’s ear, stating, “The trash needs to be taken out.” There is another empty arrow pointing out of the person’s other ear.

Correct: The alien’s statement is written in a similar arrow, stating, “Please take the trash out in a minute.” The person responds, “Sure.” There is no other arrow pointing out of the person’s other ear.

    • hangonasecond@lemmy.worldEnglish
      13·
      4 months ago

      I don’t know if it’s the same with autism, but I have read about and experienced something that impacts people with ADHD called demand avoidance, where asking someone to come help with a task or complete a task right now really fucks me up. It completely interrupts the flow of what I’m in the middle of, and I also can feel really frustrated about the demand for no good reason.

      Giving me a timer, even a short one, gives me time to mentally transition at my own pace. I assume for a “normal” person its easy to just say “yeah, in a minute”, but demand avoidance comes with a pretty strong emotional reaction (frustration, anger, guilt) that is absolutely irrational, but can’t be helped.

      Like I said, no idea if this is a thing with autism and I don’t feel like researching it. Maybe for people with autism is more about routine and planning but idk

      Edit: realised after I wrote this response that there is a good chance you’re just joking about the literal interpretation of the phrasing used in the comic, and that you know all this already, but I’m leaving it up for posterity.

      • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        4 months ago

        I was being lighthearted by converting it to seconds, but I was genuinely curious if that was part of communicating with autists. I was wondering if it’s something like what you described, or if it would mess them up further because then they might count down the seconds, thinking that was a literal request. That’s really interesting how you respond, and I’ll keep that in mind when communicating with people who have ADHD. Thanks for the informative answer!