• 11 Posts
  • 73 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • I ended up getting fired for calling out all the sexism, racism, homophobia, favourtism and abusive managers. The then new covid policies ramped up everyone’s negative traits and I couldn’t ignore it any more.

    I ended up speaking with the corporate HR about the situation and they made an honest effort to help me but I was fired before I got a chance to speak with a very high up person.

    I got a lawyer involved and while not much difference was made after the settlement, I somehow forced the HR manager into early retirement. It amazes me considering my goal was only to get her into a work behavior training course. I never knew such pettiness could accomplish so much.

    All my co-workers shat all over my efforts for the 10 months I was engaged with all of that at the workplace. Also received a fair amount of hate from my co-workers after I got fired too which was neat.






  • The actual router rented out by the service provider. I don’t think they would be happy with me messing with their property.

    I also lived somewhere else where I didn’t have access to the main router so I use the extender as my personal network for file transfers, a few lights with a couple switches and my terrarium thermostat. If anything happens to the main router, I can just turn my extender into an access point and still have my personal network.

    TP-Link requires an account to use my own extender which annoys me. Their app redirects my connection to my extender through their cloud service. It’s not my VPN because I can still connect through the browser. Seems shadey and I don’t like having the account already.


  • Unfortunately I feel this conversation has become deadlocked for a number of reasons.

    You have clearly dismissed a fellow person with a valid observation and left no room for open discussion. When given the opportunity to express why you do not agree, you continue to be dismissive.

    You have ignored the topics that has been brought up and are being discussed. In this case emotional intelligence, particularly among men.

    You have not made an attempt to clearly connect your various points into a cohesive argument.

    You have not expressed what you have studied in your own words. To express ideas in your own words would show the rest of us how you perceive and understand a topic. This would be a great base for having a meaningful conversation.

    Lastly, you have done nothing but blindly praise an individual on a podcast. If the words in your initial post are true, we should never worship anyone.

    Taking a step back away from everyone and everything to think of why we react to other peoples words may help us to understand ourselves better. And that’s a good thing.

    At this point I am done. As a fellow individual with ADHD (and Autism), I wish you the best on your mental health journey and I hope you approach it with an open heart and open mind. Thank you for giving me a new perspective for me to think about and hopefully understand in the future.


  • In order to engage you in meaningful discussion, I need to understand your thoughts and perspectives more from your own words.

    Why do you not trust the personal view of another lemmy user? We are on a social platform made for discussing a variety of topics and we will always encounter different views. Hopefully this leads to exploring and expanding our own views on the topics we bring up.

    I would also like to stay on the topic of men and emotional intelligence which was brought up by LoreleiSankTheShip. I currently do not see how neurodivergence and generational workforces fit into this discussion unless you can clearly state the connections for me.

    I do agree with you that the importance of mental health and it’s approaches are not very well explained. However, empathy carries a lot of weight in the discussion of mental health and should not be undermined or under valued.

    Lastly, it’s easy to link a video of an expert, but experts are human and can fall for personal biases too. If you can explain to me your interpretation of what this expert is saying, we can begin to have a thorough discussion. Otherwise, I fear we may be deadlocked and nothing more will come of this.

    I did watch your recommended clip and am still struggling to understand your view point.


  • People in general can learn something from stoicism. From a philosophical standpoint it can be a good place to provide tools for improving yourself from within. However, I also find it hard to accept that men are inherently emotionally weaker than women for many of the reasons mentioned by LoreleiSankTheShip.

    Modern societies extert incredible pressure on people to conform to unreasonable expectations which greatly repress individuality. These pressures start early and are persistent. Emotionally intelligent men exist and have always existed. I could easily believe many of these men couldn’t even begin to define or explain stoicism. Their emotional intelligence could have been learned from family, friends, partners or community.

    A broad and over generalized expectation of modern men are that they be strong and courageous. That they act as independent individuals to care for their family or community. Traits which could be mistaken for a surface level of stoicism.

    What we are seeing today in is very much a lack of emotional intelligence. There is a very noticeable deficiency in emotional intelligence in men when compared to women. Unable to reflect inwards about their motivations and outward actions. Unable to empathetically understand how their actions affect those around them. Unable to to identity, verbalize or express the emotions which are happening within them. As a result, men don’t have the proper understanding of themselves to begin the process of improving themselves. Trans men offer a unique insight into this as they have had the opportunity to experience two worlds of gender expectations.

    But humans are social animals. Many mammals exhibit social needs. We can look to our closest friends such as cats and dogs and see how true that is. We’ve reached a point where our social communities are fragmented and broken. The ideal of a strong man is heavily expected to replace that missing sense of community.

    It’s become and issue so deep and entangled that it’s hard to know where to even begin. I wish there was a simple -ism to unravel this mess but a person is complex. Eight billion people with eight billion unique perspectives is a level of complexity we just don’t know how to even comprehend or manage.

    We can start by teaching emotional understanding from within, by being good examples, by creating and maintaining communities or by calling out bad behavior. Unfortunately, these actions can be attacked. It’s an uphill battle and the hill is looking very steep.






  • I had been involved with the labour board over a wrongful termination dispute. I made complaints about about an abusive workplace and was shitcanned as a result.

    During the final settlement where the lawyers were fighting over what my settlement payment would be, my lawyer and I had a bit of a discussion revolving around mental health.

    She suggested I should consider a move into mental health services as I was essentially writing off continuing my trade apprenticeship by this point. She noted that I am a good listener and have a very clear understanding of mental health. She even offered to get me in contact with those in the mental health field.

    It’s been heavily on my mind to go down that path but a part of me is intimidated. I’ve been able to help a few close friends who all experienced some heavy mental issues over the past couple years but these are people who I’ve become close to and am able to help them through a deep understanding of them.

    I tend to get attached to people easily and I’m not sure how I’ll be able to separate work thoughts from my own thoughts meant for my own time. What heavy burdens will make it home with me?

    Would I be good at working in such a field? According to my lawyer and those closest to me, I’d be great. But what am I going to do about my own mental health if I follow that path path? I can barely handle children and I’m the biggest kid in my own life. It’s already a monumental effort to keep myself fed and not spontaneously running into traffic.



  • Fortunately I updated my BIOS from windows before switching to Linux and as of recently, I still have the latest version.

    I added amdgpu.runpm=0 and that did increase stability considerably. My system froze up way less often which was great.

    I also found that adding processor.max_cstate=1 has made my system even more stable and I haven’t had a freeze up in days now. This page gives a nice run down of what it does.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if there is a freeze up in the future but overall my system has been a lot more stable making everything far more enjoyable.



  • There used to be a hostel there within the last 10 years when I last looked into a trip like this. It appears to have shut down now. Couldn’t remember the name of the town so I’m glad you mentioned it right away.

    Not an easy place to get to but if I can make it work, I may go there.

    A bit crazy to see it’s either a 20 hour flight or a four day train ride though. It’s a good thing I enjoy an adventure.



  • I’d say a good way to approach this is to find a tattoo artist with a style you appreciate and ask them to draw something up for you.

    Many artists these days have online portfolio’s of their previous works (usually instagram) for you to view and get inspiration from. If not, they may also have books at their physical location for you to browse.

    Once you find an artist with a style you enjoy, simply tell them what you want and they will be happy to draw something up for you and will be happy to accomodate any changes so you are satisfied with what will be permanently in your skin.

    If you need a starting point, look up all your local tattoo studios and visit their website. Find the artist page or portfolio page and find a style that resonates with you. If you can’t find anything local, consider expanding your search to other nearby big cities. For something permanent like a tattoo, it may be worth your time to travel (within reason) to an artist.

    Hope this helps


  • I also use task.org and have found a nice set of customization options that works for me.

    Because I’m juggling different tasks with different priorities, I sort by immediacy and importance. Anything time sensitive has dates and alarms attached to it. Any tasks I wish to do currently or the next day is always moved to ‘HighPriority’ including any appointments.

    Medium and low priority stuff are things that have distant due dates or no due dates.

    I also use colours to visually show priorities I set for the day as well as adding comments to help add any extra context. Keeping titles simple is important for me to keep my data visually accessible.

    Most important is that I keep a widget on my home screen so that I always see what my tasks. Any step between seeing my tasks and staying on top of my tasks is a chance for something to be forgotten. It took me nearly half a year to get into the habit of using this app to organize myself but has helped me a lot.

    I also have a couple more lists for shopping and repeated reminders to help me stay on track too.

    Hopefully this is a good example of how someone can use these tools for themselves.