They were both in their early 80s and had been together long enough they decided to move in together.
She had 5 huge framed paintings (prints) that no longer had walls to hang upon, and she wanted me to have them. All 5 of them.
Gigantic shitty prints with ostentatious gold-painted frames, featuring rose vases and fruit baskets and the like.
I think we are all familiar with this kind of “old lady” art. It was popular among the same clientele who would purchase ugly mass produced china to keep and not use. Basically department store rubbish of their day.
It was completely okay that she offered them to me.
It was not fine that she would not take “no thank you” for an answer and kept on pressing.
It was not fine when she would not accept my answers of “I do not like them” and “I do not want them” and “they are ugly” and “if you insist on giving them away, give them to a thrift store”.
It didn’t feel particularly pleasant to me when she acted as though she was doing me a great favor, and insinuated I was being ungrateful by not appreciating their inherent value.
Finally I cracked and said okay I will take one of the paintings, may I have that big rose painting at the front?
Yes.
It becomes my property, you won’t ask for it back?
Yes it’s yours!
I picked up the painting and out the front door I went. I leaned the painting up against the elm tree on the boulevard at a 45 degree angle and proceeded to kick a hole right in the center.
I went back and said do you still want to give me those other paintings?
Later that week when I was taking gramps out for lunch he told me that it was one of the funniest things ever, and he completely agreed that it was the right thing to do given how absurd her insistence had gotten. He also said he was made to suffer for my actions though lol - although he really did not lay any blame at my feet, he let the punishment roll off his back like he always did, good guy!
I would of course never behave that way now that I’m an older man. I would just more insistently say that I’m not going to take them under any circumstances.
I was inspired to tell this story based on something I read in another thread. People were delighted to tell their mom they’re just going to throw her china in the garbage and relating how mom was freaking out, and they were relishing it!
My mother in law had a bunch of Hummel figurines and was confident they were worth a billion dollars. She wondered why they sat on market places so long and people weren’t falling all over themselves to buy them. My wife and I said it’s because they are ugly and stupid and worthless. I offered to give her $10 for every one she smashed on the ground. She declined and eventually donated them to the Salvation Army.
Oh my grandmother had those little Red Rose tea figurines all over her house. Literally hundreds of them.
She treated them like they were priceless and would give them out as gifts.
I tried explaining to her that you’re not going to get a free item in a box of tea that is worth more than the box of tea - do the basic logic gramma.
This fell on deaf ears.
At least she can always fall back on her extensive collection of Bradford Exchange commemorative plates.
The tiny little spoon market is hot right now