The number of examples I have seen of people being told to shut up about their lived experiences with sexual abuse in the past 24 hours on this platform is deeply disturbing.
I am calling on y’all to take a deep breath and listen to women for once. There is a time and place for tone policing and it’s never the very minute a woman speaks up.
You’re referring to the conversation under this comment?
yes, and others
And you disagree with the sentiment of that comment? Sorry, I’m trying to figure this out.
Men (especially young boys) being raped is a also a huge problem, but are you saying they shouldn’t be lumped together? Or that expressing one without the other is fine since they are sufficiently distinct?
Hi, I’m going to chime in here as a male survivor of SA.
They are distinct in that the problem is far more pervasive toward women than men. If I may recommend some reading about this, the book “Everyday Sexism” by Laura Bates explores this very thing and was a big eye opener for me regarding what women experience just by existing in society as women.
This in no way diminishes the experience and trauma of people like myself, but this is a greater societal issue that disproportionately affects women. That’s what we’re talking about here.
Similar to how anyone can experience discrimination, but we need to talk about the specific groups and larger systemic issues lest we lapse into the “all lives matter” way of thinking.
@[email protected] has it correct. I do not disagree with the sentiment of that comment at face value but the comment and the discussion that follow constitute men talking over women expressing their lived experiences.
As a community and a society, there is certainly room for tone policing and discussing how best to express the terms of our oppression. But that discussion should never be forced in at the very moment a person or group has found the courage to speak their own stories, which is what happened there.