I don’t understand why society demonizes that (the multiple people thing, not the lack of communication). If that’s what’s best for my partner, who am I to stop them? What does exclusivity even get me besides limiting my jealousy?
If someone needs multiple partners in their life to feel fulfilled, then wonderful, but they just have to make sure that everyone involved is fine with that before they get into the situation.
In most cultures betraying contracts is usually considered bad, and relationships are basically intimate and emotional contracts. Trust is important even in business contracts, but in interpersonal ones its ESSENTIAL. If you entered into a polyamorous relationship, cool, thats the contract all parties agreed to, but if it wasnt specifically polyamorous its defaults to monogamous, and if you breach that trust, you’re probably not getting it back, and without trust ever having a healthy relationship again is probably gone
Granted I haven’t been around the dating pool very often but from what I’ve seen of cheating it’s rarely because the person is interested in polyamory but because they are simply normal and are trying to take advantage of one aspect of a relationship and fulfill their other desires with a different relationship for example taking advantage of husband A being rich and take advantage of husband B because he’s physically hot both are being taken advantaged of and husband A feels like he’s nothing more than a wallet and husband B feels like he’s nothing more than a dick on top of all that in the US the family court system very heavily favors women so if a girl is not 100% interested in a man it’s quite possible for the man to loose his entire lively hood I will admit this is a pretty male centric take but like I said i haven’t been paying much attention to dating world and i only have the perspective of a man
You missed my point. I’m saying that if you’re not specifically in a poly relationship, then non exclusivity is an immediate and automatic relationship contract breach in 99+% of cases. So yes, the cheater isn’t interested in Poly relationships in the vast majority of cases, but I was only bringing poly relationships up because they are a notable exception to non exclusivity being an immediate deal breaker
I don’t understand why society demonizes that (the multiple people thing, not the lack of communication). If that’s what’s best for my partner, who am I to stop them? What does exclusivity even get me besides limiting my jealousy?
Polyamoury is cool. Cheating is not cool.
That’s all it comes down to - consent
If someone needs multiple partners in their life to feel fulfilled, then wonderful, but they just have to make sure that everyone involved is fine with that before they get into the situation.
In most cultures betraying contracts is usually considered bad, and relationships are basically intimate and emotional contracts. Trust is important even in business contracts, but in interpersonal ones its ESSENTIAL. If you entered into a polyamorous relationship, cool, thats the contract all parties agreed to, but if it wasnt specifically polyamorous its defaults to monogamous, and if you breach that trust, you’re probably not getting it back, and without trust ever having a healthy relationship again is probably gone
Granted I haven’t been around the dating pool very often but from what I’ve seen of cheating it’s rarely because the person is interested in polyamory but because they are simply normal and are trying to take advantage of one aspect of a relationship and fulfill their other desires with a different relationship for example taking advantage of husband A being rich and take advantage of husband B because he’s physically hot both are being taken advantaged of and husband A feels like he’s nothing more than a wallet and husband B feels like he’s nothing more than a dick on top of all that in the US the family court system very heavily favors women so if a girl is not 100% interested in a man it’s quite possible for the man to loose his entire lively hood I will admit this is a pretty male centric take but like I said i haven’t been paying much attention to dating world and i only have the perspective of a man
You missed my point. I’m saying that if you’re not specifically in a poly relationship, then non exclusivity is an immediate and automatic relationship contract breach in 99+% of cases. So yes, the cheater isn’t interested in Poly relationships in the vast majority of cases, but I was only bringing poly relationships up because they are a notable exception to non exclusivity being an immediate deal breaker