Sociopaths Misappropriate Hit Song From MN

Setting aside its singular devotion to the financial interests of the 1%, fetish for deregulation that threatens our workers and planet, and obsession with stripping rights from trans people, the MAGA movement, tonally, is really fucking mean. Case in point: This official White House video posted Monday to Instagram, in which we see footage of handcuffed young men being rounded up like dogs by Border Patrol as—Jesus Christ how is this real…—“Closing Time” by Semisonic plays, mockingly.

As you’d expect, the Minneapolis band behind the 1998 pop-rock hit isn’t cool with being used for sadistic far-right propaganda. Through their publicist, Semisonic wasted no time issuing the following statement earlier today…

We did not authorize or condone the White House’s use of our song in any way. And no, they didn’t ask. The song is about joy and possibilities and hope, and they have missed the point entirely.

What is “Closing Time” about, specifically? Frontman Dan Wilson told Billboard in 2018 that it’s inspired by the birth of his daughter, Coco.

The guys wanted a new song to close our sets with. I thought “Closing Time” would be a good title. We had spent seven years of our lives at that point, four nights a week entertaining people. That was our life. Some bouncers yelling things, closing time coming, all that imagery, literally, that’s how the song started and then when I was halfway done, I started realizing the whole thing was a pun about being born, so I just made sure that the rest of the thing could ride with that double meaning, but nobody got the joke and I didn’t bother to explain. I thought everyone would get it.

Or, to quote the top-voted comment from 24 years ago on mostly defunct lyrics website SongMeanings: “It means its closing time so get the hell out.”

Semisonic join a long list of artists who’ve unwillingly soundtracked Trump shit, including Céline Dion (“My Heart Will Go On”???), Rihanna, Adele, Steven Tyler, and Neil Young.

Let’s Hear From 3 Locally Based Ex-Federal Workers

Shoutout to Max Nesterak at the Minnesota Reformer for banging the actually, federal workers matter drum. In this great piece, he speaks to three ex-employees of the Veterans Benefits Administration (VBA), the General Services Administration (GSA), and the Federal Railroad Administration (FRA), all of whom had their lives upended by an unelected, deeply unlikable, ketamine-zooted freak who invented DOGE to gut the federal government. These unemployed Minnesotans are among the 60,000 government workers who’ve recently been cleaved from 17 different agencies, according to one estimate.

“I know it’s not personal, but it just feels personal,” says Iceley Andaya, an Air Force vet, who lost her job at the VBA.

“They’re talking about building smarter, better software and government (but) my skill set wasn’t even taken in consideration when it was time to fire people,” says Nina Sawyer, who lost her job at GSA. “They’re just going in with a hammer and breaking things.”

“The grant money that is made available to a city or a county is not going to go as far because now they’re going to have to hire me as a private consultant who can charge more for the work compared to someone who is a federal employee,” says Katie Haun Schuring, who lost her job with FRA.

Food Hall Trend Finally Reaching Richfield?

Hey, how about some non-depressing news? (Don’t worry: We’ll return to the pulling-out-your-hair beat in a sec.) The food hall craze of the past decade has yielded mixed results locally, and now one suburban holdout might give the concept a whirl. Last week Tim Naumann, co-owner of Plymouth’s Luce Line Brewing, presented Richfieldians with his plans for a 7,500-square-foot food hall at 64th & Lyndale—aka vacant land just north of Lakewinds Food Co-op.

The proposed site is currently owned by Richfield-based Cornerstone Group, whose 10-acre Lyndale Garden Center development spree has reimagined much of that area; the city’s Housing and Redevelopment Authority is offering Luce Line $750,000 to boost the project, which is estimated to cost $4.9 million. The food hall would feature three vendor stalls and Luce Line brews, J.D. Duggan at the MSP Biz Journal reports.

“It’s percolating. It’s moving along nicely,” Naumann tells Duggan, while stressing that plans are preliminary at the moment. “Generally, there’s a lot of support for this,” adds Melissa Poehlman, Richfield Director of Community Development.

Punishingly Stupid “Trump Derangement Syndrome” Bill Introduced

We’ll keep this mercifully brief. On Monday at the Minnesota Capitol, five Republican senators—Eric Lucero of St. Michael, Steve Drazkowski of Mazeppa, Nathan Wesenberg of Little Falls, Justin Eichorn of Grand Rapids, and Glenn Gruenhagen of Glencoe, all of them hopeless and charmless dumbasses—introduced a bill that would classify “Trump Derangement Syndrome” as a mental illness.

Ha, ha, ha! Way to seize on that MAGA mandate to help the lives of your constituents, you grievance-pilled, sore-winning dullards. “This is possibly the worst bill in Minnesota history,” DFL Senate Majority Leader Erin Murphy says in a statement. She goes on to talk about how the trolling bill trivializes actual mental illnesses, but honestly could have full-stopped with the quote above. “Members are free to do as they wish” counters Republican Senate Minority Leader Mark Johnson.

No House version of the bill exists at press time, and Sen. Melissa Wiklund (DFL-Bloomington) has vowed to let the Senate one die without a committee hearing.