Transphobic relatives are a lot like war and timeshares. - “The only winning move is not to play.”

It does come in handy when you have that one annoying Uncle who acts like he’s your best buddy, when in reality he’s an annoying asshole who doesn’t even give a shit about your company, he just wants to feel young by being “A bro” around the young’uns…

Second my Uncle Wes found out I was trans, he finally shut the fuck up and just quietly keeps his distance. It has… actually made him easier to tolerate. Now his son, my cousin, on the other hand… Not so much.

I have nothing against Christians, one of my best friends is a devout Catholic, sharp as a whip too, got his doctorate in Mathematics and is a huge nerd when it comes to numbers, but… I have about as much patience for Young Earth Creationists and Biblical Literalists as they do for me.

I nearly slapped that child one Thanksgiving when I casually mentioned the existence of dinosaurs while everyone was talking about Jurassic World (Had recently come out), but see, I made the mistake of talking about dinosaurs like they were real animals that once existed instead of Hollywood monsters made up by Liberal Media… So he starts chanting “THE BIG BANG IS A FAERIE TALE! NOT A THEORY!” (despite the fact that a Priest was the one who came up with the Big Bang…), over and over until I “apologize to Jesus” for my “blasphemy”

I don’t, I just let him keep doing that while I just dig into some Mashed Potatoes, eventually his mom, my Aunt has to coax him into just shutting the fuck up. The dinner table was quiet after that and I spent the rest of the day locked in my room.

I honestly hate that kid (He’s just becoming a teenager now, my mom had kids way before my aunt did), but it’s clear his Dad messed him up… At this point his Mom understands the problem, has more or less given up on religion altogether (Which tbh, kinda sucks, I hate it when extremists ruin belief systems for everybody else… I’m not a Christian, but fuck, the idea of a Loving God is a wonderful coping mechanism with how terrible the reality of the world is) and is quietly doing the “Grin and bear it for the kid till he’s 18” thing.

Still good for my Aunt I guess, she used to be a fanatic like the rest of them, my hobby used to be casually trolling her by mentioning which characters in “Current Popular Thing” were gay, just to watch her freak out… But… after seeing the damage her husband’s “Let’s just go ALL IN on the worst interpretation of Jesus possible!” has done to her kid, she’s chilled out quite a bit. Typically I see her without her husband and kid these days, she plans weekends where she comes down to get away from him, which she usually spends getting drunk on red wine, watching movies, and being good company.

I do hope the kid’s rude awakening when he goes into the real world isn’t too terrible, I’d like to see him snap out of it and realize what a monster his father is, but I’d hate to see him jump to the opposite extreme and become a “Reddit Atheist” ya know?

(Note: This aunt and uncle are on my mom’s side, the reunion people are on my dad’s side, which is why my Uncle remembers, but my dad’s side apparently doesn’t)