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The original was posted on /r/getmotivated by /u/JadeAngel1996 on 2024-01-23 03:43:13+00:00.


For a long time now I’ve been extremely unmotivated when it comes to things that I don’t find fun or interesting. Since I was at least 18, when I have thoughts of doing something I think would be great like learning Japanese, taking singing lessons, learning dances etc it always just stays in my head.

I imagine myself doing those things and how great I’d feel, but I always just leave it at that. I never bring these ideals into my reality. It’s like my brain is telling me that as long as I can experience these scenarios in my mind then that’s enough.

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia about 3 years ago (and have been chronically depressed for even longer) and things have just gotten worse since. I never have energy to do anything, and so things that could help with my motivation like exercising for health and the endorphins, or tidying stuff up to clear space and clear my mind don’t even feel reasonably doable most of the time.

I’m struggling to even find motivation to shower regularly enough to maintain a good routine and feel better about my hygiene. I don’t know what to do to make myself want to do those things, it’s sometimes like the thought of doing anything to actively benefit my health doesn’t even register as important in the slightest, and yet stuff like playing games I like or watching videos etc is a no-brainer.

I’m lost with this, it’s been so long and I still haven’t found anything that helps for a long enough time. I’ve been to counselling many times, and yet no-one has managed to crack the code with any kind of even short term solution.

My partner loves me and tries to make me feel positive about things, but he is also fairly unmotivated, so when I’ve asked if he could be a motivator for me and encourage us to go on walks or remind me to shower more often he doesn’t do it. I can’t blame him for it not getting done, as it’s my problem in the first place, but sometimes I feel like without an outside motivator nothing is going to change.

Is there anything I can do?