I am talking about love in the sense of romantic love. I am very short and ugly which makes me very unattractive. Never had a girlfriend or touched a girl. I have many girl friends but one of them was my crush but I never asked her as I knew she would never like me. I know people will say that just get successful and rich and girls will like you, but will they like me or just money. What is the point of dating then. Is there any way I will get genuine love or am I destined to live alone for life.
All the girls say they want a tall guy, I can’t grow my height, trust me I tried, I visited the doctor, I tried exercise, I tried hormones, I tried a special diet that some random YouTuber told me, I tried everything. I can’t become tall for you. I am still thinking about limb lengthening surgery, The doctor said it is very risky and very possible I could never walk, but I want to take every chance possible. Trust me I tried. As soon as I get money I am doing surgery. This was my limit I can’t go beyond that.
People are saying being funny and having confidence, and they’re right, and I’m going to tell your why. When being around you makes someone feel good, they will want to be around you more. That’s not exclusive to romantic relationships, it’s true also of friendships and business relationships, too.
An acquaintance asked me out not long ago, I declined. His looks had nothing to do with it, it was his negative personality. The few times I’d talked with him, all he ever did was complain about stuff. Complaints (without solutions) are inherently negative. I don’t need negative energy in my life. A romantic partner has to make life better.
If your expectation is for someone to come and make you happy, then you are a happiness-sink. You drain joy from other people instead of mutually building up each other. No one wants a joy-drain, and I’ll be honest with you, your attitude is one of a drain.
So, the question is, how do you make a someone’s life better? Do you being laughter to her? Do you make her feel safe? Do you give her confidence in herself? Do you bring interest to her life? Do you make her feel heard and seen? And to be clear, someone should do all those things for you mutually, too. Two people should be building each other up.
The last guy I wanted to ask out (but he abruptly lost his job and had to move to another city, so I never did) he was in his late 20s and already balding quit a bit, lanky, and has terrible posture. Physically, he not very attractive. But not only was he very funny (a good start), he was also doing his masters (intelligent and hard working), played musical instruments (passion and interest), and spent a lot of time volunteering (kind and caring). Everything about his personality drew new to him. (And honestly, next to that, what positive would I have brought to him?)