Eh, trans men get their fair share of fetishization too, especially from cis men. Just look on any mainstream porn site and you’ll see that 99% of porn featuring trans men has a cis man on top and penetrating the front hole. That’s only how a small percentage of trans men do and like sex yet it’s incredibly hard to find anything else. I’ve got gay ftm friends who have had a lot of issues with cis guys pretending to be accepting just to sleep with them but really just viewing and treating them as quirky women. Another thing is cis men who are attracted to masculinity and are exploring their sexuality but for whatever reason have internalized homophobia and sleep with trans men and are like “but I’m not gay thoooo”. It’s gross.
Then there’s women who seek out trans men because they “hate all men” or are “tired of men” but EXCEPT trans men because they’re “different.” This is what I’ve mostly experienced because I date women. I definitely would consider this fetishization. They somehow think trans men aren’t capable of things like misynogy, violence, or will inherently understand girl things by the sole virtue of being AFAB or having “afab socialization.” It’s a way of saying that we’re somehow man lite and not just men. Not to mention, trans men aren’t a monolith and some transitioned at a very young age and as such have no experience with female socialization and expectations.
Both are not uncommon and are terrible to be around.
Cis men also aren’t in the solid majority of transphobes especially with the onset of the TERF movement nowadays.
Transphobes may not be as scared when less passing or gender non-conforming trans men are near their children, but for me I found that I’ve gotta be more cautious around children and more aware of how I may come across after I transitioned (I am a binary trans man). Women are also more leery around me as a man so I have to make more of an effort to make them feel more comfortable and at ease. Guess that’s got more to do with being perceived as a guy than being perceived as trans.
This isn’t to say that trans women don’t have to deal with a lot of shit, because they certainly do.
Oh yeah for sure, I’m sorry if it seemed like I was downplaying or dismissing FTM issues that are evidently there. I just often see a difference in the types of discrimination as well as the magnitude that MTFs face typically. Perhaps that also has to do with hearing about MTFs more frequently though and I’m calling a symptom the cause? Unsure.
Wasn’t aware FTMs had male chasers as well though, that’s ass
Eh, trans men get their fair share of fetishization too, especially from cis men. Just look on any mainstream porn site and you’ll see that 99% of porn featuring trans men has a cis man on top and penetrating the front hole. That’s only how a small percentage of trans men do and like sex yet it’s incredibly hard to find anything else. I’ve got gay ftm friends who have had a lot of issues with cis guys pretending to be accepting just to sleep with them but really just viewing and treating them as quirky women. Another thing is cis men who are attracted to masculinity and are exploring their sexuality but for whatever reason have internalized homophobia and sleep with trans men and are like “but I’m not gay thoooo”. It’s gross.
Then there’s women who seek out trans men because they “hate all men” or are “tired of men” but EXCEPT trans men because they’re “different.” This is what I’ve mostly experienced because I date women. I definitely would consider this fetishization. They somehow think trans men aren’t capable of things like misynogy, violence, or will inherently understand girl things by the sole virtue of being AFAB or having “afab socialization.” It’s a way of saying that we’re somehow man lite and not just men. Not to mention, trans men aren’t a monolith and some transitioned at a very young age and as such have no experience with female socialization and expectations.
Both are not uncommon and are terrible to be around.
Cis men also aren’t in the solid majority of transphobes especially with the onset of the TERF movement nowadays.
Transphobes may not be as scared when less passing or gender non-conforming trans men are near their children, but for me I found that I’ve gotta be more cautious around children and more aware of how I may come across after I transitioned (I am a binary trans man). Women are also more leery around me as a man so I have to make more of an effort to make them feel more comfortable and at ease. Guess that’s got more to do with being perceived as a guy than being perceived as trans.
This isn’t to say that trans women don’t have to deal with a lot of shit, because they certainly do.
Oh yeah for sure, I’m sorry if it seemed like I was downplaying or dismissing FTM issues that are evidently there. I just often see a difference in the types of discrimination as well as the magnitude that MTFs face typically. Perhaps that also has to do with hearing about MTFs more frequently though and I’m calling a symptom the cause? Unsure.
Wasn’t aware FTMs had male chasers as well though, that’s ass
I see trans discrimination and problems we face as a venn diagram, a lot of things overlap, though they may take slightly different forms.
I wouldn’t say either has it objectively worse. It’s similar in some ways, different in others.