I really just need to talk about this to someone. I’m in college and I’ve always loved to learn, but now I don’t feel motivated do my school work or to study, but at the same time, when a test roles around and I don’t know how to answer the questions I get stressed and care about trying to do well. I’ve also always beaten myself over the head about having good grades, my parents never had to push me to do good in school. I’m just so stressed about it, the semester is ending soon, and I’m scared I’m gonna fail 2 classes which will be then first time I’ve ever failed a class.
I got my GED because some credits wouldn’t transfer and I would graduate later than my peers. I dropped out of college after two years to pursue a career path (not a very smart one, in hindsight, but one that still afforded me certain opportunities). I’ve worked as a software engineer, but moved back to IT because helping people directly is more gratifying, even if it’s lower impact. There were other factors at play (hated long hours, hated long commute).
The point is, you’re not fucked. That you have to ask means that you’re in bad shape with mental health. That’s not a death sentence. Maybe try therapy (works for me) and possibly additional treatment. There might be something that requires active management or it could just be that you’ve hit a temporary rough patch. Get help and don’t be hard on yourself for needing it. Everyone does in some fashion.
One of the most profound things I was ever taught was a parent explaining that they read the memoire of someone they greatly admired and found out that they (the author) had all the same insecurities and fears. They were human.