They were both in their early 80s and had been together long enough they decided to move in together.
She had 5 huge framed paintings (prints) that no longer had walls to hang upon, and she wanted me to have them. All 5 of them.
Gigantic shitty prints with ostentatious gold-painted frames, featuring rose vases and fruit baskets and the like.
I think we are all familiar with this kind of “old lady” art. It was popular among the same clientele who would purchase ugly mass produced china to keep and not use. Basically department store rubbish of their day.
It was completely okay that she offered them to me.
It was not fine that she would not take “no thank you” for an answer and kept on pressing.
It was not fine when she would not accept my answers of “I do not like them” and “I do not want them” and “they are ugly” and “if you insist on giving them away, give them to a thrift store”.
It didn’t feel particularly pleasant to me when she acted as though she was doing me a great favor, and insinuated I was being ungrateful by not appreciating their inherent value.
Finally I cracked and said okay I will take one of the paintings, may I have that big rose painting at the front?
Yes.
It becomes my property, you won’t ask for it back?
Yes it’s yours!
I picked up the painting and out the front door I went. I leaned the painting up against the elm tree on the boulevard at a 45 degree angle and proceeded to kick a hole right in the center.
I went back and said do you still want to give me those other paintings?
Later that week when I was taking gramps out for lunch he told me that it was one of the funniest things ever, and he completely agreed that it was the right thing to do given how absurd her insistence had gotten. He also said he was made to suffer for my actions though lol - although he really did not lay any blame at my feet, he let the punishment roll off his back like he always did, good guy!
I would of course never behave that way now that I’m an older man. I would just more insistently say that I’m not going to take them under any circumstances.
I was inspired to tell this story based on something I read in another thread. People were delighted to tell their mom they’re just going to throw her china in the garbage and relating how mom was freaking out, and they were relishing it!
I let my emotions get the best of me as a young man.
Still though, the best answer for me now is to not let other people make their problems my problems. The old cliche of “no” being a complete and unambiguous answer. Repeat until heard.
I do agree on that. I might ask “are you sure” after hearing a “no”, but that’s about it. After the second time, I don’t push any more. It’s polite and you got your answer two times in a row, so… I’d say that settles it.