Damned if you do, damned if you don’t

Girl, you’re a fucking dragon. You’re hot as fuck, bitch.

I knew I recognized that look.

That’s nothing. Breast feeding is the real danger zone.

One time my wife was feeding one of our kids and she said something like, “Damn, these hormones. I don’t know why but breast feeding fills me with rage. Like, I could actually stab you with this [points at knitting needle] .”

She wasn’t visibly upset. She was calm and cool like she is 99.99% of the time. But the fact that she even mentioned it means I came way closer than I would like to having my nice little nap in the recliner interrupted by a knitting needle to the face.

Throw chocolate at her and retreat to a safe distance.