Things that are common among rape survivors as coping mechanisms:
-Dark humor about rape
-Fantasizing about sex that looks like rape as a way to reestablish a feeling of control
These are not universal experiences - everyone processes differently - but they are common. Feeling shame about them is also common, or being told that they invalidate victimhood.
I believe you’re trying to help, so I’m not mad at you. But you aren’t helping.
Embarrassed at making insensitive jokes in public where other survivors could be very offended by it?
Being a survivor does not mean you get to do whatever you want. And I would expect them to understand that their way of coping may not be everyone’s way of coping, especially if it’s through dark humor. And they would be sensitive to the fact that others could be very upset by it. Time, place and context matter.
But seriously - I’m being voted down on Lemmy because I’m saying “hey maybe we shouldn’t make rape jokes ‘a thing’”???
Eh on one hand yeah it’s probably insensitive to joke about rape but at the same time calling insensitive jokes is just going to bring more attention to it and now everyone is focused on fighting over a insensitive joke instead of focusing on helping those in need I suppose it’s kinda like a scab the more you pick the more the wound bleeds
Things that are common among rape survivors as coping mechanisms:
-Dark humor about rape
-Fantasizing about sex that looks like rape as a way to reestablish a feeling of control
These are not universal experiences - everyone processes differently - but they are common. Feeling shame about them is also common, or being told that they invalidate victimhood.
I believe you’re trying to help, so I’m not mad at you. But you aren’t helping.
Hmm… How would those survivors feel reading others joking about rape though? Without knowing what place it comes from?
I don’t think we would want to normalize “joking about rape” on the Internet as “okay”.
How would those survivors feel when they’re shamed by you?
Embarrassed at making insensitive jokes in public where other survivors could be very offended by it?
Being a survivor does not mean you get to do whatever you want. And I would expect them to understand that their way of coping may not be everyone’s way of coping, especially if it’s through dark humor. And they would be sensitive to the fact that others could be very upset by it. Time, place and context matter.
But seriously - I’m being voted down on Lemmy because I’m saying “hey maybe we shouldn’t make rape jokes ‘a thing’”???
Eh on one hand yeah it’s probably insensitive to joke about rape but at the same time calling insensitive jokes is just going to bring more attention to it and now everyone is focused on fighting over a insensitive joke instead of focusing on helping those in need I suppose it’s kinda like a scab the more you pick the more the wound bleeds