• ddh
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    127 days ago

    Tim Walz inflated the score of the other team because they weren’t doing so well.

  • @[email protected]
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    67 days ago

    Next you’re gonna tell me the fish he caught on a fishing trip in '99 was slightly smaller than he described. Outrageous.

  • @[email protected]
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    57 days ago

    The Onion is fake news! It wasn’t Walter Mondale who did the photo op in the tank. It was Michael Dukakis. FAKE NEWS

  • @[email protected]
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    37 days ago

    In other words doing dad stuff. Sounds like the “opposition” is against fatherhood now

  • @[email protected]
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    7 days ago

    Don’t give them ideas, HT…

    His brother already shared that his “big story” was no one wanted to sit next to Tim on road trips as a child because he used to get car sick.

      • @[email protected]
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        27 days ago

        It’s real. Surprised that didn’t make it to nottheonion right away. Maybe I missed it.

      • @[email protected]
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        137 days ago

        https://www.huffpost.com/entry/jeff-walz-tim-walz-brother-carsickness_n_66d8ae04e4b09a3ee66d3568

        Walz had implied in his Facebook posts that he had stories suggesting that his younger brother isn’t “the type of character you want making decisions about your future.” But in the segment Wednesday, he admitted to NewsNation that he didn’t have any political bombshells ― just some stomach-turning anecdotes.

        “Nobody wanted to sit with him, because he had car sickness and would always throw up on us, that sort of thing,” Walz said. “There’s really nothing else hidden behind there. People are assuming something else. There’s other stories like that, but I think that probably gives you the gist of it.”

        • @[email protected]
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          36 days ago

          What a weird thing to talk about out loud. That feels like a joke you’d make at Thanksgiving, not publicly in the middle of a vice presidential campaign.

  • Ech
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    447 days ago

    “Bag toss” lol

    Satire site doesn’t wanna say cornhole?

    • @[email protected]
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      27 days ago

      Growing up in the midwest, we always called it “bean bag toss.” I remember someone calling it “bean bag golf.” shrug

    • @[email protected]
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      17 days ago

      I just assumed some global megacorp had finally managed to get “Cornhole” through the trademark office and started suing everyone into oblivion. Must be time for an internet break to rebalance the pessimism.

    • @[email protected]
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      617 days ago

      However, the governor will not be apologizing for calling it ‘bags’ instead of ‘cornhole.’”

      • Ech
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        157 days ago

        Lol, fair. Didn’t click through to read it.

    • Poot
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      457 days ago

      I’m a gay northerner who moved to Georgia many years ago. When one of my co-workers said he was going to go play cornhole with his buddies, I asked if I could come too.

      Needless to say, I was terribly disappointed.

        • Poot
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          117 days ago

          My neck of the woods it was used to refer to m2m anal, don’t know about the “unlubed” bit.

      • @[email protected]
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        67 days ago

        Disappointed because lack of butt stuff, or because cornhole is a really boring game?

        I’d believe either.

      • @[email protected]
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        27 days ago

        I was 35 before I heard it called anything but bags. I only found out it’s called cornhole (because I guess the bags used to be filled with corn?) because I was at a bar, and it was on. On ESPN. That’s also the day I learned ESPN will show just about anything that can be classified as a sport or game when there aren’t major sports events going on.

        I laughed for a solid several minutes about it. (Thankfully I was not by myself or I’d have looked like a nutter)

    • @[email protected]OP
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      7 days ago

      It’s addressed in the article but the game has several regional names. Cornhole is one of them.

      • Drusas
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        57 days ago

        We all just called it “beanbag toss” when I was a kid, but now people from the area have switched to calling it cornhole.

    • Bakkoda
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      77 days ago

      Saying pop vs soda can get you killed in some places. This ain’t shit.

        • @[email protected]
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          97 days ago

          The word “soda” comes from the sodium salts in carbonated water, which reduce the liquid’s acidity. The word may also come from the Italian word suwwād, which refers to a saltwort that can be used to obtain sodium carbonate. The first known use of the word “soda” was in 1558.

          The term “pop” was first used in the early 19th century as a colloquial term for fizzy drinks. The earliest known use of the word was in 1812, when poet Robert Southey wrote in a letter that a new drink was “called pop, because ‘pop goes the cork’ when it is drawn”. The term “soda pop” was later combined from the words “pop” and “soda” in 1863.

          I mean soda was around to refer to a carbonated beverage hundreds of years before pop came into use. Plus pop is one of those confusing English language words that can mean a few different things (dad, loud-noise, carbonated-beverage, punch, arrive, etc.). You do you though. And keep thinking anybody who does things differently than you is weird. That’s healthy.

        • @[email protected]
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          57 days ago

          My mom’s 100% rural redneck boyfriend is an avid “bags” player and calls soda “pop” as well as calling dinner “supper” and any dish he isn’t familiar with is a “casserole”

        • @[email protected]
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          7 days ago

          I called it pop when I was a kid, then I grew up. I don’t call it soda though. Now I just call it whatever is actually in the can.

        • Bakkoda
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          17 days ago

          We got one!!!

  • @[email protected]
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    407 days ago

    I saw the headline, and I automatically assumed that this was an actual “scandal” that Fox News was cooking up.

  • @[email protected]
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    7 days ago

    It took me way too many bites of this onion to realize what I was eating. Well done.

    Conservatism has become identical to parodies of conservatism.

    • @[email protected]
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      57 days ago

      I got to family bbq and I was like what, why does this even matter…. Yes. Nice job onion

  • Diplomjodler
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    257 days ago

    Such a scandal! He must step down now! There can be no compromise on ethics for Democratic candidates!

    • @[email protected]
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      7 days ago

      He inflated the score by 2 points only. What a loser. Well he won, but you know what I mean. Don would have inflated the score by 145 points. He’s the best inflater, nobody inflates like he does. He has inflated so much that he had the biggest inflation ever. Ah fuck, you know what I mean.

  • circuitfarmer
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    87 days ago

    I can see it now. Years into the future, a weird Republican coalition in Congress: “But his bag toss!” “Where’s Tim’s real score?”

    As the country burns.