Trying to gauge if I’m going crazy or a little too much “online.”

I currently live in Texas, and moving has been on my mind a lot lately as the Republican party and Texas itself seems to be slowly moving toward fascism. I don’t know when the slide toward fascism will stop, and how much more authoritarian the state will get. I do not feel very good about my tax dollars going to support this state.

I am a middle-aged cishet white man; middle to upper middle class software engineer. I have leftist opinions (libsoc/ansoc), but I’m not an activist (I am very introverted, probably a little bit on the autism spectrum, and pretty much a hermit right now). I do seldom indulge in marijuana consumption, which is illegal here.

I really don’t have much tying me down here. I have no close friends, no family in the state, and no current romantic partners. Last year, I moved within the state for a job, but the company was bought out, and everyone was layed off. I have very high autonomy at my current job, and could probably work fully remote if I wanted. Moving would be expensive (I am in an upside-down mortgage), but I have enough savings to take the hit.

I am personally feeling very isolated here (Texas suburb), at this point in my life, and am thinking about moving into some sort of intentional community (eco-village, cohousing, or land trust; not a commune) in a blue state (or even in Canada if I could pull that off).

Also, the weather in the last 2 years has been absolutely oppressive, and I have a hard time keeping anything alive in my veggie garden :)

Am I being over dramatic? Should I just stick it out here, and try to rebuild my life in a state that doesn’t align with my beliefs?

Also, I’ve heard arguments that libs should stay or even move to red states, but I’m not convinced. The state rules with an iron fist, and pre-empts anything progressive Texas cities try to do. And the district I live in is already pretty solidly blue. Not to mention, red states put families that contain females or lbgt people in danger.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    719 months ago

    You seem to not be enjoying your current situation anyway so I’d vote for a change. We are all very small fish in a big sea when it comes to changing states whereas you can make a big change in your own life.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    489 months ago

    You can only choose what’s right for you. I’ve often said that if I was able to work remotely with a high paying job that I would buy a big house in a small town.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    479 months ago

    This is something that I think about often. There is an argument that progressives should try to stay and change things for the better where they are. I think to some extent, though, that only works if everyone is operating in good faith. The government there is essentially conducting a full assault on any progressive measures. Just recently, Texas passed a law that automatically overrules any city ordinances that they dont like. More progressive cities like Austin can try to pass laws to protect tenants or workers, but it won’t do anything. It’s hard to make a positive impact in those circumstances. You also have to balance out the fact that by living there X% of your paycheck will go to that govt via property/sales tax.

    On the other hand, where do you move to? There are lots of communities with skyrocketing real estate prices that they blame on remote workers (not sure how legitimate that is), so people are getting priced out of the communities they’ve been in for ages.

    In the end, I think it’s impossible to make a complete moral determination either way. The only thing you can do is just try your best at whatever you do. Whatever you do, I’d definitely recommend trying to build a community wherever you are. You might not be able to get the local laws around you to reflect your values, but you can do your best to help those around you.

  • JackbyDev
    link
    fedilink
    English
    279 months ago

    There’s plenty of things going on in Texas that affect everyone. The biggest one in my opinion is the horrible electric grid and refusal to connect to the rest of the nation.

    • @31337OP
      link
      19 months ago

      True, I was without electricity, heat, and water for about a week a few years ago.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    209 months ago

    Gotta go with what works for you. But as a fellow cishet middle-aged white engineer, you could not pay me enough money for me to want to move to Texas. Or Florida. Or most of the middle of the country. If I were in your shoes, I’d be out as soon as I had the means to leave.

    • guyrocket
      link
      fedilink
      89 months ago

      Isn’t the weather alone enough of an argument against TX or FL? What will it be like there in 10 or 20 years?

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        English
        39 months ago

        I mean, I’m a fuckin’ weirdo who loves both heat and humidity. So I’m not really the target audience for that particular argument. But I get that I’m a weirdo, and most people don’t like living in the desert or a swamp. Personally, I’m much more turned off by their politics than I am their weather.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    199 months ago

    Since you have the means and nothing to tie you down, I’d say go for it. It would be interesting to try living somewhere different. You only have so many years to experience life. Any sort of rural area further North should still be affordable and be kinder to your vegetable garden.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    199 months ago

    I just moved from NC to the Pacific Northwest for very similar reasons. Remote work in tech and no close family ties back in NC. My partner and I moved here a few months ago and while the cost of living is definitely an adjustment, it has been a positive change in every other way. The weather is great and the people are wonderful. I no longer get nervous or anxious going out in public. I actually enjoy restaurants and farmers markets here. You only get one life. Be happy.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    179 months ago

    agree with what everyone else has said here. worry less about “should” and go find your tribe wherever it may be.

    as i once said to a friend who contemplated the same kind of move years ago, if it doesn’t work out you can always move back. not like it’s a one way street.

  • Rhynoplaz
    link
    fedilink
    169 months ago

    Try a Midwest swing state! I live in a backwoods town in PA, and although there’s not much of a chance of a Dem winning a local election, we have enough major cities to keep fascism out of the State law.

    I might be very wrong, but I wouldn’t be against Texas and Florida leaving and starting their own countries. Let all the boot licking racists go live happily together far away from me.

    • @31337OP
      link
      29 months ago

      Recreational marijuana is illegal in PA. I’ve kinda been using recreational marijuana laws as a litmus test on how authoritarian a state is. Also, I do sometimes use marijuana, and don’t want to go to jail. I’ve had a few close-calls here in Texas (once, the cops just stole my weed). Been looking at rural NY as a possibility. I may visit some intentional communities there soon.

      • Rhynoplaz
        link
        fedilink
        19 months ago

        Very true. There is a lot of talk about changing that in Harrisburg, so hopefully it won’t take long. Michigan and New York are close legal options.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      99 months ago

      Texas population is purple, we just need more people to vote. My work and social circle are 85% blue and 15% moderate red. You’re going to find people who agree and disagree with you in any situation and that’s how it should be. You have to do what’s right for you, but wherever you are, vote and encourage people around you to vote. That’s the only way anything gets better.

      • pjhenry1216
        link
        fedilink
        79 months ago

        “people who […] disagree with you and that’s how it should be” I mean… except for human rights. Like there’s a ton of crap that no decent human should agree with going on in states like Texas, Florida, and more. Some of that is inexcusable, even if the person is uneducated and easier that way. Plenty of knowledge freely available on the internet. Many of the social positions of conservatives simply cannot be excused, even as a “we need differing opinions”

        • edric
          link
          fedilink
          49 months ago

          Yup it’s getting harder and harder to have that conversation. Like the video posted yesterday of the guy who went to a Trump rally, had civilized conversations with some of the people there, and found out they mostly had the same thoughts the the left had (i.e. the rich shouldn’t be as rich as they are, we’re living in an oligarchy, everything shouldn’t be owned by 6 big corporations, etc.). That’s nice and all, but at the end of the day, who are these people voting?

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          19 months ago

          Therein lies the question. Stay and fight the good fight, get out while the getting is good, or ignore the sensational headlines because overall most of these people are actually pretty nice besides their hard coded habit to vote R.

          • pjhenry1216
            link
            fedilink
            59 months ago

            I don’t care if you’re hard coded to vote against human rights. That’s an automatic bad person. Period. All Republicans Are Bastards. They let the worst of them rise to power and they pass horrendous laws in their states. It’s just inexcusable at this point. Like, the only people I feel that want to have “the conversation” are folks who want to keep voting Republican for whatever reason. I’ve failed to ever hear a good argument, even a fiscally conservative one at this point. The financial imbalance alone is the root of most economic downturn at this point. And honestly, the fiscal argument doesn’t outweigh basic human rights. No “good” person votes republican at this point. They just can’t accept theyre the bad guys and instead of switching sides, just declaring “nah, let’s ruin more lives instead. They’re the problem.” Many of their tentpole issues are rooted in hating someone else. Republicans are just not good people. Period. I just don’t buy it. You can’t justify voting against human rights.

            • @[email protected]
              link
              fedilink
              09 months ago

              Think Hank Hill, not Tucker. I don’t disagree with you and have a very hard time reconciling the fact that these otherwise kind decent folks continue to vote R. I think a ton of them are just disengaged voting by muscle memory, misled by faux news, and figure it is politics as usual.

              You should review the thread title and re read the OP’s question. If you get off the internet and go outside and talk to people you see it’s actually quite nice out there for the most part. So should you uproot your life to get while the getting is good, stick around and tough it out, or what? It’s nowhere near as simple as you make it seem.

              • pjhenry1216
                link
                fedilink
                29 months ago

                I just said do whatever is best for their mental health. And don’t get me wrong, what’s going on is great for some people. But it’s hell for others. Glossing over that might make you feel ok or whatever, but ignoring it and the fact Republicans likely have passed bills that have no social benefit but will likely cause people to die, whether by their own hand or shitty medical practices, is 100% not possible.

                Don’t downplay the hardships others face because it doesn’t specifically affect you. It’s kind of gross and not at all as enlightened as you’re trying to sound.

  • geogle
    link
    fedilink
    149 months ago

    The states are not liberal or conservative, it’s the fraction of rural/suburban to urban areas. It’s extremely rare to find a left leaning rural population and similarly difficult to find a very right urban one. Find a place that suites you, but keep in mind your hood’s politics will largely be controlled by population density https://engaging-data.com/election-population-density/

    • @31337OP
      link
      39 months ago

      Yeah, I know. I grew up in a very rural area, and now live in a major metro area. It’s not so much the people in my area that I have a problem with, it’s the state government. I’ve met plenty of like-minded people in my area, and most have been contemplating moving out of state as well, lol. I’m trying to figure out where I want to set down roots at, and right now it seems like a gamble that Texas won’t become more authoritarian in ways that negatively affect me as time goes on. Even current legislation could negatively affect me if my life circumstances change.

  • Throwaway
    link
    fedilink
    129 months ago

    If you have to ask, it might be best if you move. But you’d most likely fall into the same habits and become isolated again. Have you tried joining a club or something?

  • 🐍🩶🐢
    link
    fedilink
    English
    119 months ago

    I left Texas many years ago and you couldn’t pay me enough to move back. Get out. Go experience other communities, cultures, and locations. Go somewhere where any future romantic partners have actual human rights and healthcare. Go somewhere that doesn’t have a state flag as part of its identity. It will be an adjustment, but change can be good.

  • RickRussell_CA
    link
    fedilink
    English
    119 months ago

    I made the move 15 years ago.

    I’m certainly glad to be in a society that isn’t hostile to females, LGBTQ, etc.

    Does it affect my day-to-day? Eh, probably not. I certainly could live in a regressive state without any personal risk or penalty.

  • @Coolkicks
    link
    109 months ago

    I’m in the same boat in Texas right now. Want to move to a more liberal state, and have several friends who already have.

    The reason I stay is every person like me who leaves makes Texas more red. And often times, a liberal Texan is a conservative Californian/Coloradan/Canadian, so moving to one of those place will also move them to the right, so both places shift red.

    Case in point. I have a friend who moved from NYC to Dallas because NY was too liberal and their conservative votes didn’t count there. They lasted 6 months before deciding to vote democrat in Texas, because red here is further right than they are comfortable with, so their move made NYC and Dallas more liberal.

    • @31337OP
      link
      29 months ago

      I’m left of the DNC (a socialist), so wouldn’t be a problem. Only things “right” about me are I like target shooting, and dislike restrictive zoning laws.