• statler_waldorf@sopuli.xyz
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    4 days ago

    I don’t think it’s quite that simple. I’m a dad to a FtM trans teenager and I was born in the early 80s. There’s a lot of “inertia” to the worldview presented as “normal” in education, media, and society at large just in my lifetime.

    I think the first time I learned that homosexuality was a thing was from Ellen. I know now that everyone isn’t hetero but every relationship I saw around me, in books, in movies for my the most formative years of my life defined it as “normal” in my brain.

    All I knew outside of “gender norms” was Bugs Bunny in drag, Bosom Buddies, Some Like it Hot, Rocky Horror. It was “not normal”, a joke.

    I come from a liberal family with a liberal upbringing. I’ve considered myself an LGBT ally for a long time, but I still have a lot of implicit biases in my head.

    When my child came out as trans, those implicit biases were the first things into my head. I love my son for who he is, want him to be happy, and fully support him. When he decided to dress fem for the first time after hatching my implicit biases were confused. But it doesn’t matter what those biases say because I consciously support what makes him happy.

    My parents were born in the 50s. They are both unabashed feminists but they had another 30 years of that “inertia” to overcome when my son hatched. They still occasionally forget the right pronouns. His one remaining great grandmother has almost 20 years more inertia to overcome and still uses the wrong name occasionally.

    I guess what I’m saying is that I agree with you to an extent. These things threaten their “inertia” and it’s hard to question yourself like that. It’s easier to dig your heels in and fight back.

    • gerryflap@feddit.nl
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      3 hours ago

      I think we agree yeah. More progressive people will be more open to challenge their “inertia” with new ideas that they believe are right. I think more conservative people give in more to the feeling of these “new” ideas being “wrong”. That doesn’t mean that more progressive people don’t feel those same feelings. I’m in my early 30s and I notice that I do start to struggle more with the difference between what I was taught (and thus what I subconsciously sometimes feel) and how I perceive the world now from a logical perspective. I strongly support people being trans or non-binary because I feel like it makes the world a better place, but deep inside there’s still some part that feels like it’s wrong for people to deviate from the gender rules I’ve been fed from birth.