Men get so many mixed messages in today’s society, from being called toxic to being pushed to be top dog (or else you’re a loser). There are lots of expectations put on men, and various ways men rebel against those.
What can be done to address society’s negative views of men and masculinity? And how can we formulate what healthy masculinity looks like, so we can teach that to our boys?
I agree with your solution: be good at something. That is key to valuing yourself.
But I disagree with “the default role is gone”. What I see is that men are still expected to be the main breadwinners and providers. It’s just that that role is no longer as respected as it once was. It’s a silent “minimum” that’s expected of men, and we’d better not complain about it.
People may say that men no longer need to be breadwinners and providers, but in practice men who aren’t are looked down upon and have trouble finding a partner.
Yes, this is true in my experience. Men are still expected to provide and protect.
When it comes to dating, the common sentiment now is that the one asking should be the one to pay. We are still traditional when it comes so initiating so it usually falls on the man having to pay anyway. What feminists say they want, and women actually want are not the same. In my experience, the vast majority of women I know expect their husbands to provide for them even if they’re earning money themselves.