One thing i agree on with you is that at most of the women i had sex with were pretty bad at verbalizing what they want in bed, regardless of when they are asked about it, and that’s coming from an european where sex stuff is a lot less taboo to talk about than in the states. This is one thing that gets better with age, tho - older women seem to be much more vocal about their needs, so i would say experience is the key factor here. given how sexually repressive the US are especially towards women, it’s something that only social reform can fix, and currently the US are making steps backwards instead of forwards in that regard.
Body shaming to hurt someone during a breakup is not ok and a character flaw; breakups hurt enough as it is without stuff like that. I’m happy i haven’t experienced that yet; all my relationships so far have ended amicably, even if tears where involved on both sides - it just didn’t work out anymore. There would probably be no issue if i met any of my previous partners again.
I do not agree that all sex is transactional. I know it isn’t for me, i can be perfectly content with giving pleasure without receiving anything in return, and i believe most sex is cooperative, working together towards fullfillment of both parties. That includes a transaction, if you really want to be pedantic about it, but the transaction is pretty low-key.
One thing i agree on with you is that at most of the women i had sex with were pretty bad at verbalizing what they want in bed, regardless of when they are asked about it, and that’s coming from an european where sex stuff is a lot less taboo to talk about than in the states. This is one thing that gets better with age, tho - older women seem to be much more vocal about their needs, so i would say experience is the key factor here. given how sexually repressive the US are especially towards women, it’s something that only social reform can fix, and currently the US are making steps backwards instead of forwards in that regard.
Body shaming to hurt someone during a breakup is not ok and a character flaw; breakups hurt enough as it is without stuff like that. I’m happy i haven’t experienced that yet; all my relationships so far have ended amicably, even if tears where involved on both sides - it just didn’t work out anymore. There would probably be no issue if i met any of my previous partners again.
I do not agree that all sex is transactional. I know it isn’t for me, i can be perfectly content with giving pleasure without receiving anything in return, and i believe most sex is cooperative, working together towards fullfillment of both parties. That includes a transaction, if you really want to be pedantic about it, but the transaction is pretty low-key.