my lover is a very high iq person (140) and he’s so awesome and yea has a lot of knowlegde about a lot of things, but recently i took an iq test and i got 85, it sucks, i told him that i hope that does not affect any aspect of our relationship!! and i’m not going to sugar code it but honestly i think that difference does cause a bit of trouble in our relationship because i am aware that my low iq may cause problems or it could make him feel annoyed/bothered!! what can i do to improve that?? i love him so much and i don’t want him to feel like i don’t understand him, sometiems i don’t a lot but, i always understand the general idea of the stuff he likes and i’m always seeking out more knowledge from him and the wider internet. thank you!!!
edit: i’ve always thought i was 100 or 150+ iq because i am interested in open source software, linux, foss, gnu, the fediverse, and reading, etc!! programming too
Forget IQ for a moment, for all the good reasons that other people have given you.
One of you will know more than the other or learn more easily than the other. That’s unavoidable. Even if the gap seems small, there might be key moments where the gap causes conflict. This is going to happen, whether it’s you or them who “is ahead”.
The question is this: how do you handle it?
If you treat each other with contempt, that’s a problem. That could be you assuming that they are always going to look down or you or them assuming that you’re not trying to “be better”. There are many ways for this kind do contempt to show itself in your relationship. Each of you has the responsibility to not think that way. Each of you has the responsibility for accepting and loving the other.
If you can’t learn to do that, then your relationship is doomed to fail. If you can learn to do that, then you stand a chance.
You both can choose.
Some things about my partner used to irritate me and I learned to accept them for the things they’ve tried to change but just can’t. That acceptance is key.
Good luck and peace.