On the journey to becoming a productive member of society I had to compartmentalize my inner child.

During my early schoolboy years, he waited patiently for the school day to finish so that he could finally resume his creative and playful pursuits.

As the education became more involved, he had to wait a little longer because of homework.

In university, the complicated assignments, group projects, and late night study sessions meant that he would often not get to let loose until the weekend.

The full-time job, commute, technical projects, work politics, and other adult responsibilities really did the biggest number on him though. Sometimes he would go without playing for weeks, or months at a time.

Today it’s as if my adult mask has adhered permanently to my face and I can no longer access him at all.

  • masterspace@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    Honestly that sounds bleak AF.

    Why would you ever “compartmentalize” your inner child? That doesn’t sound like a real thing, that sounds like whoever influenced you (and/or yourself) making you cut off the things you like for no reason.

    During my early schoolboy years, he waited patiently for the school day to finish so that he could finally resume his creative and playful pursuits.

    As the education became more involved, he had to wait a little longer because of homework.

    In university, the complicated assignments, group projects, and late night study sessions meant that he would often not get to let loose until the weekend.

    The full-time job, commute, technical projects, work politics, and other adult responsibilities really did the biggest number on him though. Sometimes he would go without playing for weeks, or months at a time.

    You know what’s telling about the whole above description that you gave of your life?

    You never take ownership or agency. Everything you wrote, you wrote as if it happened to you, and you were just a passive observer with no control over the situation.

    Why was your commute so long? Why when work ended at 5pm, did you not have hours to play until you had to go to bed around midnight? Why did you never choose to change your situation?

    • Wild Bill@midwest.social
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      1 year ago

      Sounds a bit harsh but these are the questions to ask yourself. Too many times people are passive and don’t realise they have some power in certain situations.

    • SamboT@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Because they made the right choice for the goals they set out to reach. The lack of agency is just a playful way of writing.

      • masterspace@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        It sounds like they made no choices and lived life passively just doing what was expected of them.

        And there is rarely a single path to achieve an objective.

        • SamboT@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          There’s nothing wrong with doing what’s expected of you. At any time I can give up my career and coast at the expense of my stability but I never choose that option. That doesn’t mean I’m not making the decision to continue to work.

          If you have an option to keep my free time and financial stability then I’m listening.

          • masterspace@lemmy.ca
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            1 year ago

            There’s nothing wrong with doing what’s expected of you.

            There is something wrong with never making choices to try and improve your life though.

            At any time I can give up my career and coast at the expense of my stability but I never choose that option. That doesn’t mean I’m not making the decision to continue to work.

            If you have an option to keep my free time and financial stability then I’m listening.

            Find a better / closer / remote job and quit your current one.

            Buy or rent cheaper housing so that you’re not so financially constrained and / or have a shorter commute.

            Don’t just finish school and spend all your free time mindlessly dating because that’s whats expected and then spend all your free time just doing couple stuff and then spend all your free time raising kids. Carve out time for your own hobbies and interests and friends.

            • SamboT@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              OP looking back and yearning for their childhood does not mean they did anything wrong in their life path. Growing away from your childhood is very common.

              You have no idea if OP is proud of their path and is casually reminiscing or if they believe they should have done something different.

              All of your wikihow tier advice is a weirdly specific to a life that we know nothing about. OP has discipline to continually make the same decision to stay on their path instead of getting distracted by selfish instant gratification.

              • masterspace@lemmy.ca
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                1 year ago

                OP looking back and yearning for their childhood does not mean they did anything wrong in their life path. Growing away from your childhood is very common.

                You have no idea if OP is proud of their path and is casually reminiscing or if they believe they should have done something different.

                They’re disconnected from their “inner child” the universal symbol of joyous freedom. No one yearns to be connected to their inner miserable child. The fact that they’re asking, is an inherent sign of discontentness and I stand by it sounding bleak. And lots of people living bleak lives doesn’t make them less bleak.

                All of your wikihow tier advice is a weirdly specific to a life that we know nothing about.

                The broad advice was in response to your broad context free question:

                If you have an option to keep my free time and financial stability then I’m listening.

                If you want better advice, ask a better question, if you want generic advice on how to have better financial stability and more free time, than the answer probably lies in your job, your housing, and your relationships.

                OP has discipline to continually make the same decision to stay on their path instead of getting distracted by selfish instant gratification.

                Lmao, look who’s painting an oddly specific picture in literally the next sentence. XD

                • SamboT@lemm.ee
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                  1 year ago

                  Telling someone to change jobs and avoid dating is not the same thing as saying he delayed gratification. The ladder is just a quality of growing away from your childhood.

                  My question was rhetorical. You still tried to answer my question by making up context just like your posts about OP. This is what I’m saying is pointless. There are more important things in life than retaining your childhood such as providing for yourself and others. I would guess in most cases, growing away from your childhood is done out of necessity. It’s a sacrifice of time people choose because of the consequences of the alternative but you say OP should have made different decisions to prioritize their childhood? Your criticisms are only valid for someone who sacrifices needlessly which doesn’t seem like a common thing.