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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/AaronGX_8 on 2023-07-04 08:50:11+00:00.

Yeah, from just the title alone you know the direction this is gonna go in…

For context gonna call the online gf “M” and the online friend “Y”

I met a girl in a game online early this year (M) and I feel like its gone well for the most part, had some some rough bumps here and there. What relationship dosn’t?

Unrelated to this fuck up, but mentioning it might be some relivence/part or add to my fuckup? She made an online friend with a guy 3 months in (not my online friend I’m gonna mention later) but after me speaking up my concerns about him as he liked her and she just wanted to talk to him cuz she didn’t have any friends even though he clearly had feelings for her. My gf confessed she had a bit of dirty talk with him but that was it. It caused an argument where I was very hurt and she was trying to justify it as a joke? Who the hell jokes to their friends about touching eachother like that? If I joked about touching a woman sexually, she woulden’t have seen it as a joke. But anyway, that causes us to break up. I said to her “I’m willing to move past this if you remove him. Its either me or him” she picked me, but she soon caused another argument a few days later about it, that I took away her friend? So after that argument he stopped talking for about a week or 2.

During this healing process I made an online friend (Y) in the same game, he was pretty cool, wasnt online that much but still hung out when we had the chance.

Soon after about the 2 weeks of not talking to M, she messaged me in discord and said she was sorry trying yo fix things. And how I was right about that male friend of hers. During the time we wasnt talking she tried talking to her male friend again but realised he was super toxic and I was right about him not being good for her. I’m the forgive and forget type, so I gave her a second changce. I was worried that it might have been a bad idea but as the year continued on, we didnt have any issues, she was genuinly trying to change and better herself so we forgot all of that. Her male friend is no longer relivent to this story as he’s gone for good.

Unrelated but she was even here for me when my granmother died (whos like a mother to me) while my actual mum is in critical care in hospital, her always calling me and being there for me really helped loads. I didn’t love anyone more in the entire world.

Now for the long awated fuck up:

I was playing a game with M, but figured to invite my online friend Y cuz he’s been down recently and wanted to chear him up! We all played, everyone got along it was a good time. Then M and Y add eachother on discord, nothing wrong with that in my eyes! He’s a nice guy, things with M are still good, didn’t see an issue with it. Then for the next month, wasnt too bad, still got to spend time with M, got to do our group games. No issues until recent.

For some reason this past week they got super close. They had a list of horror games they wanted to play with eachother, was calling just those two. I’m not sure if I was over thinking or anything but I did get admittedly jeallouse and on edge. As even though I forgave her for the past, I was still a bit unhealed and had unrealised damage and trust issues from that experiance. Anyway, as the week goes on there calling more and inviting me to play less… Now she won’t even 1 to 1 call me like we used to, the only time I can get her in a call is if its a group call, all 3 of us. Then thats where it became apparent to me…

I tried expressing my feeings to her as I’m very open and honest. She just keeps giving dry one word replies, when we do our group call I feel like a third wheel, laughing at him loads, not saying much to me in call. “I ask do you want me to leave?” And both of them say no as they dont want me to go? Like what the hell. Y is acting normal though, he will talk to me and stuff, just M is acting super weird. Though I watched how they act in game, they have matching avatars, he’s always following her around in game. Like wtf, this is too far.

Finnaly managed to get M to talk to me in discord, and she was explaining that he just gets very clingy as he’s lonley and theres nothing to worry about, and she has a lot in common with him and he’s the bestest friend she’s ever had and that she likes how there someone who wants to plah video games 24/7 (as thats all she seems to do while I need breaks and to do other stuff in life) but Y wasnt this active before, he’s always played games and gone and came back. Now all of a sudden he’s playing games 24/7?

He’s expressed to me that he dosn’t like her, and he dosnt do relationships cuz he has extream trust issues. Yet there calling and not inviting me to play games? Sure I can join any time I want, if I call the group call they both join, I randomly join their game, we play. Just all of this dosnt feel right at all… At the same time Y does feel genuin, he’s not that smart of a person and he could be seeing it as innocent as possible that I’m not seeing? Just he’s always smothering on her and I can never get any time alone with M anymore. I feel like if I tell Y to back off abit, he will fee bad or it will cause arguments between me and M…

I’ve never felt like this at all before, this has just triggerd my mental health to just decline, panicattacks, meltdowns. The first ever time in life the thought of suicide? (Even though I know not to do it and I have control, the thoughts are just there) Like why has this all just suddenly come up unannounced. Its just so fustrating seeing someone I love with all my heart just statt to drift and I’m powerless to stop it, feeing reaponcible that this is my fault. Intrusive thoughts that those two are happy together while I’m forgotten about. I was even gonna visit her as we live not too far from eachother soon, I was gonna take her out and thought it would be nice to meet up.

I don’t know what to do… (I know this isnt an advice reddit but any advice would be great help)

TL:DR I introduced my online gf to my online friend, and now I feel like the third wheel. I’m never invited to play, they are always playing and calling 24/7 and I cant get any time alone with my gf anymore.