ChatGTP

lol how in the hell did they let that through?

At this point, you should respond and ask for sworn testimony from the person who wrote the ticket.

Ome of the dudes mentioned was 81! At least in the article from when this was posted a few days ago. Calling an 81 year old “middle-aged” might be a bit too generous.

Moran*

Exactly. Raise your hand. Great, you overcame gravity for a second. Keep your hand raised for a minute. 10 minutes. An hour. Fuck, gravity doesn’t stop. It’s exactly like us.

This whole thing reminds me of when Trump wanted to drop corporate tax rates to 20%. Not due to some well thought out analysis… he just thought 20% was a nice round number.

This dude is a fucking moron.

Yeah he’s absolutely deranged. It’s worth just reading the emails rather than the article, since it shows how much of a nut job this guy really is.

https://blovish.github.io/kirkslider/

Dude shit his pants. People were like “stop shitting your pants, you moron”. Dude wiped some of the shit out of his pants using his hand. Now his pants still smell like shit and he has shit all over his hands.

Fox News is like "great job not shitting your pants, Mr. President, you goddamn genius!”

Aw man, that’s rough. He killed a camera-person who recently complained they didn’t feel safe flying with the pilot.

Only days before the crash, Pierce, 34, had told friends he was uncomfortable flying with Rivero, 42, because of his stunts

How does that differ from death sentence?

It’s way more fun, for starters.

It was 42 for me specifically. Good luck!

spicy foods upset my stomach (I can eat them, but it has consequences).

Same. It sucks. My brothers have continually given me shit for decades for being a bitch that doesn’t like spicy wings. I’m like “dudes, it’s not that I don’t enjoy the taste, it’s that my stomach will literally cramp up 4 hours from now and I’ll be shitting pain.”

They don’t care.

I can also measurable lower my heart rate by conscious effort alone

I read somewhere a while back that people can learn to do this with training and a visualization. If you have a heart rate monitor that shows different color shades depending on your rate, apparently people can learn focus on making the color turn green and lowering their heart rate.

Exactly! And in this case, “what’s it” is having knees that don’t hurt.

The craziest one was when we had a staff lunch, and she was like “Jimmy johns, roast beef, with mustard and hot peppers mix”

Next time she does that, say “joke’s on you, I actually just went down on the neighbor lady” and see how she reacts.

I thought everyone could do this. That’s a super power?!

I used to wonder why adults didn’t run up the stairs. I figured adults must just be no fun and didn’t want to look silly running upstairs.

So all throughout my childhood, teens, 20s, and 30s I would usually run up my stairs because it just felt natural. Then not too far into my 40s, my knee was just like “nope”.

Now I have to walk upstairs, which is lame as hell.

“awww shiiiiitttt I’m about to be punched in the face”

…

…

…

“Ouch!”

It really is just as simple as that.