If there were an occasional thing where I looked at it and thought “wait, is this Loss?” that would be funny. But I see them way too frequently for them to be funny. They need to be subtle and occasional, taking one off guard. Instead they’re frequent and unsubtle.
I’m sure I’ll get shouted down for this suggestion by the haters, but I’m going to make it anyway because it’s actually really good:
Use an Ubuntu LTS flavour like Kubuntu. Then, add flatpak and for apps you want to keep up to date, install either the flatpak or the snap, depending on the particular app. In my personal experience, sometimes the flatpak is better and sometimes the snap is better. (I would add Nix to the mix, but I wouldn’t call it particularly easy for beginners.)
This gets you: