I’m a dude, but I frequently browse BadWomansAnatomy. I was having a (calm, respectful) debate with a few users regarding how a lot of people that have “transitioned” still bear hallmarks of their former gender (I mentioned one of my long time friends who has gone from MTF and still looks the same. Kaitlin and Elliot are also good examples). The ban was because I dared to use the “dead names” of Elliot Page and Kaitlin Jenner! Oh the horror! 😱

I went to post in /r/rant how I just thought it was ridiculous and it was autoremoved because I mentioned the world “mod” in the title and I mentioned a specific community 🤣

  • southsamurai
    15•3 days ago

    I mean, did you intend to dead name them? If not, did you correct yourself?

    Because if you did it intentionally, you’re an asshole. If you did it by mistake because you brain farted, but didn’t correct it, you’re an asshole. You did use the right names here, so I ain’t mad. But let me frame things for you.

    If you went through the effort of changing what people call you from your first name to your middle name, anyone refusing to switch would be an asshole. Doing it if you were struggling with something major related to that name would make them a giant asshole.

    IDGAF who it is, if they aren’t picking a name just to fuck with people, you fucking call them what they want to be called, period. Anything else is just douchebaggery.

    Now, when you add in that dead naming trans people can be an act of aggressive verbal attack to trans people as a whole, the person doing so isn’t just an asshole, they’re a bigoted asshole.

    Is that who you want to be? The person that fucks with people just trying their best to live a free and happy life? If that is who you want to be, I have to warn you that reddit is not the only place online you’ll end up barred from. And there are people that will treat you poorly because of being an asshole. Actions have consequences, and words can be a form of action. While I support your freedom to say what you want within the framework of general legality regarding incitement, that doesn’t mean anyone has to accept that kind of thing and let you spew nastiness.

    So, take the ban like an adult. Accept that you fucked up enough for the community, and use that in the future to really think about the subject and decide who you want to be.