Eh, what is he supposed to do then? Creep around until she clocks out? Just give her the space and agency to disengage. Give her your number on a piece of paper. And don’t make it awkward if she doesn’t respond.
But don’t leave time for a response! Hand the paper over as you drop a one-liner (“would love to grab coffee sometime!”) on your way out.
Note to others:
A small fraction of the population will still have their days ruined even by such an unintrusive approach, but to ensure we never bother a single soul we’d need never to interact with anybody. We certainly have to be VERY careful with captive audiences which is why end-of-transaction + departure approaches are a necessity, whereas there’s no such mandate in a nightclub: they’ll have to deal with it if you offer to buy them a drink and, after declining, they still see you on the dance floor later.
You don’t want to absolutely restrict humanity from basic social interactions, and you don’t want to force humanity to offer a social response when they can’t leave from somewhere they’re being paid to be (with pressure to offer good service/be pleasant). There is a happy middle ground.
This is the way to do it. I used to work retail and it worked with me twice, on the receiving end. As other commenter has said do it on your way out, it’s mortifying having to help a customer after/while they’re hitting on you, specially if you’re super shy as myself.
n? Creep around until she clocks out? Just give her the space and agency to disengage. Give her your number on a piece of paper. And don’t make it awkward if she doesn’t respond.
leave a note with your number and the greatest pickup line
IMO, the best ways is through friends. Arrange game/movie nights, picnics, etc, and encourage people to invite their friends. Go with friends to local events, like library or city events, and try to say hi to at least a few new people. Go hiking and chat with others at the destination. Rinse and repeat.
It’s hard (esp. if you’re an introvert like I am), but that’s basically how everyone in my family met their SOs, except one who found their SO later in life through an app. Get outside your comfort zone and meet new people, and eventually you’ll meet someone you hit it off with. And IMO, don’t focus on their gender, just expand your friend circle and someone will have a friend or sibling of your preferred gender and orientation. Worst case scenario, you meet some interesting people.
Yeah, I think apps are particularly awful because you’re there specifically to find romance, and if you don’t find it, there really is no consolation prize. If you go out and meet people, even if you don’t find romance, you’ll at least meet interesting people and maybe make a few friends.
So that’s why I recommend people avoid apps and instead force themselves into social situations.
Eh, what is he supposed to do then? Creep around until she clocks out? Just give her the space and agency to disengage. Give her your number on a piece of paper. And don’t make it awkward if she doesn’t respond.
But don’t leave time for a response! Hand the paper over as you drop a one-liner (“would love to grab coffee sometime!”) on your way out.
Note to others:
A small fraction of the population will still have their days ruined even by such an unintrusive approach, but to ensure we never bother a single soul we’d need never to interact with anybody. We certainly have to be VERY careful with captive audiences which is why end-of-transaction + departure approaches are a necessity, whereas there’s no such mandate in a nightclub: they’ll have to deal with it if you offer to buy them a drink and, after declining, they still see you on the dance floor later.
You don’t want to absolutely restrict humanity from basic social interactions, and you don’t want to force humanity to offer a social response when they can’t leave from somewhere they’re being paid to be (with pressure to offer good service/be pleasant). There is a happy middle ground.
This is the way to do it. I used to work retail and it worked with me twice, on the receiving end. As other commenter has said do it on your way out, it’s mortifying having to help a customer after/while they’re hitting on you, specially if you’re super shy as myself.
leave a note with your number and the greatest pickup line
Just… you know… find someone else.
To be honest … where? Third places are closing down, everyone is either at work or at home. So it’s either that or some shitty app.
IMO, the best ways is through friends. Arrange game/movie nights, picnics, etc, and encourage people to invite their friends. Go with friends to local events, like library or city events, and try to say hi to at least a few new people. Go hiking and chat with others at the destination. Rinse and repeat.
It’s hard (esp. if you’re an introvert like I am), but that’s basically how everyone in my family met their SOs, except one who found their SO later in life through an app. Get outside your comfort zone and meet new people, and eventually you’ll meet someone you hit it off with. And IMO, don’t focus on their gender, just expand your friend circle and someone will have a friend or sibling of your preferred gender and orientation. Worst case scenario, you meet some interesting people.
I got lucky, met my other half at uni, and I can’t imagine how shitty dating must be for people who weren’t as lucky as I am.
I see people meeting through apps, but I also see a whole bunch of unhappy people who don’t know how to meet other people.
Yeah, I think apps are particularly awful because you’re there specifically to find romance, and if you don’t find it, there really is no consolation prize. If you go out and meet people, even if you don’t find romance, you’ll at least meet interesting people and maybe make a few friends.
So that’s why I recommend people avoid apps and instead force themselves into social situations.