I know this is probably a shitposting meme. And my wife and my female friend, when I asked them, both laughed and said, “Yeah all the time.” I can’t tell if it’s sarcasm.

I asked this because Im a guy, and we’ve heard it all before. The guy plowing a warm apple pie. The ookie cookie BS. The jerk off with a sock. Dudes have done some weird things. I absolutely have found myself relieving some stress in interesting ways.

But veggies: Is this a common thing? Am I going to have to worry that my daughter, when she reaches a curious age, starts exploring with vegetables?

During puberty, should I start giving my children Amazon gift cards or no questions ask money to protect my produce?

I am aware this question is ridiculous and I am prepared to be ridiculed.

  • @DudeImMacGyver
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    311 month ago

    Veggies are certainly not unheard of, but everyone is different. Your wife and friend may be serious, or not, but some people totally fuck vegetables.

    • @[email protected]
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      fedilink
      171 month ago

      When i was in the early weeks of getting freaky with my now wife we were at her place making out and I picked up the TV remote and asked if she’d ever used it as a dildo and she blushed a little and said yes.

      • @DudeImMacGyver
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        31 month ago

        One of my exes would use bottles sometimes, I was always a little nervous about them breaking but fortunately it never happened.