• fibojoly
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    26 days ago

    Ireland is the only place where pubs are actual genuine places to meet and chat with strangers. And even then it can be difficult. Came back to France after 13 years and I was just flabbergasted at the difference. Everyone is out with their little group and no one seems to talk with anyone outside that little sphere. Only spot where it’s socially acceptable to engage strangers is the counter itself and that’s about it; and if you do it feels like you’re a freak, honestly. I tried a few times to just meet people that way, and gave up.

    Only way that worked for me was joining a hobby or sport or some other group like that. Volleyball got me a job within like two weeks of joining! Couchsurfing got me great friends, girlfriends and eventually my wife.

    • Rolando@lemmy.world
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      26 days ago

      Couchsurfing got me great friends, girlfriends and eventually my wife.

      I should totally try that. It’d be like: “Honey? How long is Rolando going to be staying on our couch? He spends all his time on his laptop giggling at that weird website full of communists and furries…” / “I don’t know… Let’s… Let’s set him up with that friend of yours, I bet that’ll get him out of here!”

    • Wandering_jaguar@lemmy.world
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      26 days ago

      America in general has become just a hostile place to live and interact in. I think people really underestimate how detrimental to ones mental health living in a country that allows people to own guns is and it’s a rl big tragedy. I think it’s the biggest difference between u.s and other countries and it shows culturally. If we got rid of all guns in the U.S. we would probably win the world cup and no one would even come close.

      • Letstakealook@lemm.ee
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        26 days ago

        To be clear… you’re afraid to talk to people because guns exist? If this is true, you may need to speak to someone about this professionally.

        • Rekorse
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          26 days ago

          Sort of reductive.

          Violence is bad in America. People feel it appropriate to start arguments about politics in public with strangers. Those people are allowed to have guns on them and in their cars. An angry person with a gun on their hip is just different.

          Thats just as a man too, women deal with worse, and I would argue even have a reason to need a gun themselves in some situations.

          Its violent all around here and it comes from regular ass people, like your neighbors.

          • ealoe@ani.social
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            26 days ago

            Dude get off the Internet, real life is not full of violent strangers looking to start arguments. Go outdoors, meet some people, enjoy a nice hobby with them and stop watching internet ragebait

            • Rekorse
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              25 days ago

              Not what I said but sorry I scared you.

        • PriorityMotif@lemmy.world
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          26 days ago

          Actually, yeah, if you try to talk to someone’s girlfriend in the wrong place you probably won’t get shot, but you would be in pretty big danger. Violence is extremely prevalent in the u.s.

        • Wandering_jaguar@lemmy.world
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          24 days ago

          All I said was that a gun in the room makes everything a little more tense and maybe we should just see how banning them for a year goes and instead of telling why it wouldn’t work you took that as a chance to come at the dude online. What I said just sounds like common sense. But yeah maybe I need to talk to someone and def not the guy targeting people. What a terrible comment.

      • TʜᴇʀᴀᴘʏGⒶʀʏ@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        26 days ago

        Are you competing for the Olympic long jump? Because that’s quite a leap, holy shit. What do guns have to do with it? I understand you may have some preoccupations about it that interfere in this way, but most people don’t

        • Wandering_jaguar@lemmy.world
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          24 days ago

          It’s really not that big of a leap, guns tense things up. This tenseness leads to more devisive people and less communication comes about. When you think of a gun chances are what comes to mind first isn’t going to be something you want to think about. Now multiply that for the amount of people whose familys been affected from one. That’s alot of bad vibes spreading around, a lot of depressed people not going out. If we can take those thoughts away and replace them with good ones yeah I think we would be better off. Kinda interesting you chose to make this about me when there are many other ways this convo could have gone. Also Australia did it and every one of those fuckers I run into are hilarious and idk if it’s correlated or not but hey maybe let’s just try it out and see.

          • TʜᴇʀᴀᴘʏGⒶʀʏ@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            24 days ago

            guns tense things up.

            Not typically among people who are regularly exposed to them

            When you think of a gun chances are what comes to mind first isn’t going to be something you want to think about.

            No, I think of the handgun in my nightstand, my father’s hunting rifle, my cop brother’s electronic gun safe, my friend’s revolver, and my former drug dealer’s shotgun

            … a lot of depressed people not going out.

            I’ve held that same handgun to my head and contemplated pulling the trigger, and I’m no closer to understanding what you mean by this

            If we can take those thoughts away and replace them with good ones yeah I think we would be better off.

            Seems like we could accomplish the same with universal gun safety classes/ positive exposure in k-12 (and greater access to no-cost therapy)

            Kinda interesting you chose to make this about me when there are many other ways this convo could have gone.

            I think you’re in the minority for feeling this way. Just because you’re stating it as if it’s a universal truth doesn’t make it so. It’s a personal feeling you shared- I didn’t make it about you.

            Australia did it and every one of those fuckers I run into are hilarious and idk if it’s correlated or not but hey maybe let’s just try it out and see.

            You got me there- if it makes everyone funny, that might be worth it

            • Wandering_jaguar@lemmy.world
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              23 days ago

              It would be worth. You could of bought a jet ski for the amount you spent on guns and if you have one already, what’s better than one jet ski? Two jet ski’s! And that sounds like a lot more fun than what ever the best thing you’ve accomplished with your hobby is.

                  • TʜᴇʀᴀᴘʏGⒶʀʏ@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                    23 days ago

                    Nope, I spent like $500 for a handgun about a decade ago, plus maybe $100 since then in ammo for practice. People who spend like +10k on guns probably consider it their hobby, and I assume they enjoy that hobby more than they would enjoy a jet ski, but I don’t know anyone with more than 3 guns, and that’s one for deer hunting, one for bird hunting, and one for protection/defense (from wildlife and people)

      • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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        22 days ago

        I remember when the insurrection happened I thought liberals could no longer deny the absolute need for the working class to remain armed. And I was right, a ton of my blue conservative friends got strapped. But the democratic party doesn’t represent its voters, so why should I be surprised the DNC never changed their position?

        Even now as the democrats warn time and again that we are one election away from fascism, they still refuse to drop their anti gun position.

        I will not rely on the same cops that violently attack us for my protection. Did you forget the police violence of the George floydd protests? Did you forget about warren vs district of Columbia.

        The wheels of justice have always turned so slow, for some not at all. These wheels have now rusted and seized up. The business plot 2.0 is a huge success.

        We are on our own. Always has been.

        SocialistRA.org