• Hideakikarate
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    3 days ago

    I’ll bite. Referring to women as “females” is usually used by incels. Women, ladies, those are your safer bets.

    • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      Well, thank you for clarifying at least. I’m not changing the wording. Let me be clear, I’m definitely not blaming you for being helpful - I appreciate at least knowing. However, if someone reads my post supporting and valuing women and the thing they comment on is the word “female” as if that makes me an incel misogynist, then I don’t really care. I wrote a post in this thread about the radicalization of men, and I used the word “male” 4 times. 31 upvotes, no downvotes (at time of posting) and no one had issue with “male”.

      I support women and I never ever use the actually pejorative terms, but I’m not stopping using the word female. Incels use the word “women” too all the time btw. There’s even the famous coffee meme that uses the word “women” and I hate it because I’m a gamer and it’s always used in gamer communities to mock women.

      Edit: After thought and given how people seem upset, I won’t post on this forum anymore. I’m sure there are some who will think “Bye - no loss” and it’s their right to do so and tell me so if they want. I don’t like that my obvious intent was overridden by the use of a very common word and it feels like a minefield I’m not interested in navigating. That “female” is an ok adjective but a really offensive noun just seems odd, especially when the equally-misused “woman” is fine. Hateful people say words hatefully and if you let them claim words there won’t be any left. I’d never hear something like “males are being pulled to the extreme right” and wonder if they mean humans (aka dehumanizing). In a lifetime spent with female friends and decades on boards like Reddit and Lemmy this is the very first time it’s been an issue. I have other thoughts but they’re not helpful so I’ll just say adios.

      P.S. I’ll keep on supporting women in other places. I believe strongly that the only ethical position is that a person be judged by their character, and determined fit for any role by their capabilities as opposed to genitalia, ethnicity, preferred sexuality, etc. Regardless of people telling me they know my beliefs better than I do, I actually know what I believe - biases of all kinds must be fought, especially now.

      • vzq@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        I’m a gamer

        Yeah, saw that one coming.

        Anyway, you can say “female” as an adjective all day. It’s the noun that has really icky nonhuman connotations.

        • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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          3 days ago

          Stop trying to force misogyny on me. It’s crazy that I tried so hard to convey the fact that women are valuable and needed, and now because of one word and the fact I play video games (and have for 25 years) you’re posting “got you” replies like I’m sexist.

          • ShareMySims
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            3 days ago

            Stop trying to force misogyny on me.

            Stop doubling down on misogyny then. You might not have known initially, but you do now, and no longer have an excuse.

            It’s crazy that I tried so hard to convey the fact that women are valuable and needed

            Perhaps if you didn’t double down on your refusal to use human terms when talking about human women, you might come across more like someone who genuinely cares, rather than someone virtue signalling for a pat on the back.

            • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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              3 days ago

              you might come across more like someone who genuinely cares, rather than someone virtue signalling for a pat on the back.

              Nope. I’m going to continue supporting women as equal to men, I’ll use male and female as terms to describe both, and if I do so without your approval so be it. I know where I stand as someone who cares about people regardless of gender and recognizes women’s rights still have a way to go (and are under attack especially now). As such I don’t mind you trying to tear down my honest support as virtue signalling because it’s just not true.

          • vzq@lemmy.world
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            3 days ago

            My man. I’ve been playing games for 40. But I don’t identify as “a gamer” because, yeah, that.

            Anyway, yes, the words you choose convey meaning. Pick the ones that convey the meaning you want, or live with the meaning you convey.

      • prettybunnys
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        3 days ago

        Your moral high ground eroded when you vociferously said it was everyone else who was wrong about the current connotation of the word.