The issue is that women should be free to discuss women’s issues without being harassed. And sometimes those issues include men. That’s when the harassment starts.
Yeah I don’t really know what to do about that. That’s the state of things right now and it is always going to be a fight to move the bar on harassment. It used to be slapped/pinched butts and generally forced servitude.
I’m not ““tough”” enough to moderate my own community that would inevitably put both it & myself as a target of harassment. Not going to risk putting myself through that. I’m stressed enough.
Yeah, ain’t saying it has to be you but it unfortunately has to be someone for the space to exist. I’m not the right person either…but a space is necessary to allow for meaningful discussion and people to see and hear about those experiences and perspectives. I’m saying that because those trans and furry communities exist it should be possible for people to make a feminine space here on lemmy besides femcel memes.
I know for a fact that I’m not the only woman who has gone to say something, then deleted it because that element seems strong here.
I’ll say that of the space on lemmy where I’ve seen women’s issues discussed, the place I’ve felt safest about it is blahaj, but I am not gonna try and coopt their space. They really deserve to have a space somewhere. I’m glad they’ve got one here.
In the meantime, most of the women I’ve run into on lemmy feel uncomfortable making waves in the spaces where those people are, but we tend to skew older, so while it’s sad, at least we’re used to keeping quiet.
E; some pretty gross comments in this thread alone. If those negative and ignorant comments were higher than this one, and I saw them first, I wouldn’t have made this comment either.
We need a safe space, but most of the women I know on here don’t have the time or energy to moderate it. And there’s so few of us, it feels like it’s not worth the effort anyway.
It used to be slapped/pinched butts and generally forced servitude.
I get what you’re saying here, but these statements really minimize the issue.
If a non-white person came here with a concern about hostility in spaces on Lemmy, I sincerely hope the response would not be as dismissive as “yeah, it’s always been a problem. That’s just how it is. Used to be slavery and slurs. You have it so easy on the internet compared to those days!” Not saying it’s a one-to-one comparison to your statement, but it’s an issue that someone doesn’t feel safe talking about their unique experiences in a space that touts itself as progressive.
I see trans folks come here and have been accommodated fantasticly in nearly all communities! It’s so wonderful to see! And I love seeing them talk about issues that often stem from cis folk who simply don’t understand their struggles. Hell, I do not weigh-in opinions in trans communities (other than to give support) because I am not trans, and I do not feel I have the right to insert myself into those discussions.
As far as “be the change you want to see”, I absolutely understand that many folks have the view of “if you don’t have the intention to change things, then stop complaining”, and I get it. I do. But I want to complain in order, at the very least, get this issue noticed.
I understand that I cannot expect others to facilitate change for me, but, as stated before, I am not a person who is mentally strong enough to do so. My wish is for someone with stronger mental fortitude to take the issue seriously and help where I am unable to do so. That’s my wish.
Yeah I don’t really know what to do about that. That’s the state of things right now and it is always going to be a fight to move the bar on harassment. It used to be slapped/pinched butts and generally forced servitude.
Yeah, ain’t saying it has to be you but it unfortunately has to be someone for the space to exist. I’m not the right person either…but a space is necessary to allow for meaningful discussion and people to see and hear about those experiences and perspectives. I’m saying that because those trans and furry communities exist it should be possible for people to make a feminine space here on lemmy besides femcel memes.
I know for a fact that I’m not the only woman who has gone to say something, then deleted it because that element seems strong here.
I’ll say that of the space on lemmy where I’ve seen women’s issues discussed, the place I’ve felt safest about it is blahaj, but I am not gonna try and coopt their space. They really deserve to have a space somewhere. I’m glad they’ve got one here.
In the meantime, most of the women I’ve run into on lemmy feel uncomfortable making waves in the spaces where those people are, but we tend to skew older, so while it’s sad, at least we’re used to keeping quiet.
E; some pretty gross comments in this thread alone. If those negative and ignorant comments were higher than this one, and I saw them first, I wouldn’t have made this comment either.
We need a safe space, but most of the women I know on here don’t have the time or energy to moderate it. And there’s so few of us, it feels like it’s not worth the effort anyway.
I think there are more women than you think. They are leaning for good (avoid harassment) or bad( not talk about things) to be quiet as you mention.
I hope things will improve. Hope all the harassers have lives as unpleasant as they deserve.
I get what you’re saying here, but these statements really minimize the issue.
If a non-white person came here with a concern about hostility in spaces on Lemmy, I sincerely hope the response would not be as dismissive as “yeah, it’s always been a problem. That’s just how it is. Used to be slavery and slurs. You have it so easy on the internet compared to those days!” Not saying it’s a one-to-one comparison to your statement, but it’s an issue that someone doesn’t feel safe talking about their unique experiences in a space that touts itself as progressive.
I see trans folks come here and have been accommodated fantasticly in nearly all communities! It’s so wonderful to see! And I love seeing them talk about issues that often stem from cis folk who simply don’t understand their struggles. Hell, I do not weigh-in opinions in trans communities (other than to give support) because I am not trans, and I do not feel I have the right to insert myself into those discussions.
As far as “be the change you want to see”, I absolutely understand that many folks have the view of “if you don’t have the intention to change things, then stop complaining”, and I get it. I do. But I want to complain in order, at the very least, get this issue noticed.
I understand that I cannot expect others to facilitate change for me, but, as stated before, I am not a person who is mentally strong enough to do so. My wish is for someone with stronger mental fortitude to take the issue seriously and help where I am unable to do so. That’s my wish.