re-publicado de: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/23181039
i’m so sick of this. i’m just gonna stop dating people who prefer men because people i love ditch me for them.
they’re usually bi but then like men more. obviously men are better partners than women to them because they leave me for some dude. i’m so sick of it.
i’ve never even dated someone who exclusively liked girls, so i’ve never been left for another girl but i’d obviously be liked better by ppl i love if i were a man. (some ppl would dump me for other women tho probably)
ditched, ignored, dumped. i’m so sick of this. i want someone who loves me and only me. someone who wont break up with me for some dude. someone who wont ignore me and talk to dudes behind my back like my gf. i love my partners equally, im so tired of not getting the same fucking treatment.
i am done.
i’m never dating anyone else who already has a partner, ik they prefer the existing partner over me regardless of if they are poly.
i don’t want to be friends anymore when i’ll just be ignored.
Fwiw, I’ve had two bi partners break up with me for women.
And I ain’t mad about it. For me, if it’s something that fundamental, as in them needing what being with a fellow woman provides, I know I can’t provide that. I’m cis-het and male, so there’s a wide range of experiences I have no access to, there’s the physical differences, so getting broken up with on that basis isn’t something that’s on me. I didn’t fuck up, it wasn’t something I could have met their needs for and didn’t. So, while it hurts, it somehow hurts less than a breakup for other reasons.
It’s not the same thing as your situation, I know. I’m just hoping that maybe it can give you a different way of looking at your situation and maybe take some of the sting away, turn it down a notch.
Fwiw, I’ve also tried dating people that were poly, or in an open relationship (they aren’t the same thing, but they can feel the same when you’re a third wheel). It ain’t for me either. Like you, what I really want is committed monogamy. It works for me. Which makes me agree that it’s probably time for you to make that a hard no in your life. It isn’t for everyone, and trying to make it work sucks for everyone involved when it won’t.