Almost every jar of pickles claims a serving of pickles has zero calories. Now clearly, this is incorrect and the result of exploiting some ridiculous FDA loophole, since anyone knows that cucumbers provide calories.

So let’s say you’re in a situation where you lose all access to food, but you’ve got effectively unlimited access to pickles – like, you’re trapped inside a recently abandoned pickle warehouse.

Could you conceivably eat enough pickles to survive for a month? Two months? Or would your body just shut down from all the sodium and acid?

  • Punkie@lemmy.world
    2134·
    9 months ago

    Well, it really reminds me of that famous GreenText about pickles

    • frickineh@lemmy.world
      451·
      9 months ago

      Oh good, it’s not just me. I came here to say that the odds of shitting pure pickle juice are way too high to make it worth the risk.

    • snooggums@kbin.social
      43·
      9 months ago

      If anyone hasn’t had a butt cam (colonoscopy) before, this basically describes the process for flushing out before the procedure, except the stuff they give you doesn’t taste as good as pickles.

      • jballsEnglish
        25·
        9 months ago

        You’ve never thrown up before?

          • jballsEnglish
            16·
            9 months ago

            I think it is after the 2nd or 3rd round

          • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
            12·
            9 months ago

            If you’ve had a stomach flu of that variety, it totally is.

            I’ve had a flu so bad I barfed every ~ 30 minutes for over 12 hours.

            By the end my throat was on fire

            • ArxCyberwolf@lemmy.ca
              6·
              9 months ago

              Stomach acid is also why people with some eating disorders like bulimia have badly eroded teeth. The acid from throwing up constantly eats away at your teeth.

              • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
                3·
                9 months ago

                Yep. I’m always careful to rinse my mouth thoroughly after barfing, even if still nauseous

                • starman2112
                  1·
                  9 months ago

                  Just don’t immediately brush! It weakens your enamel, so swish and spit, and wait like half an hour to brush

            • thawed_caveman@lemmy.world
              2·
              9 months ago

              But in this situation you can drink water and wash it down, preventing acid damage to your eusophagus. The author of this greentext can’t get water into their intestines.

              • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
                2·
                9 months ago

                Did I say I was trying to solve for greentext’s situation?

                My comment is clearly related to vomiting