Context: Me and my partner went out for a meal last night. 7-9. The restaurant in question was absolutely heaving as you’d expect on a Friday night. And we got unfortunately positioned directly next to the offending group of maybe 10 adults and 3-4 young kids.

I should say, the kids weren’t the issue here, for the most part they were on a separate table and we didn’t hear them (we’ve got two of our own, we don’t mind a bit of kid noise). The adults though, oh boy.

Now normally I’m not one to complain (guess what - I didn’t complain) but these guys were getting looks from across the entire venue. They’re swearing, they’re doing some sort of (almost comedic) booming laughing thing that wouldn’t have been out of place at a Brian Blessed convention and this went on for the entire 2 hours they were there.

In short: how do you get a party of people to tone it down just a little so that the rest of us can enjoy our evening out, without getting a torrent of abuse or making it incredibly awkward? Is It even possible?

Edit

This…went in a direction I wasn’t expecting. Just trying to drum up a little Saturday morning activity for the community. If I was that bothered I’d have just asked the staff to ask them to tell the group to quieten down.

I’m not sure how or why this got into a debate about the rights and wrongs of GenZ; a generation I’m not even a member of but hey ho.

Y’all have a nice day now.

  • blackn1ght@feddit.uk
    36·
    10 months ago

    I think I’d have made a comment to a member of staff that the table is disruptive and they’re ruining your evening, let them deal with it.

  • GONADS125@feddit.de
    4·
    10 months ago

    I’d politely ask, and then escalate depending on their reaction.

    “Hey would you guys mind keeping your volume down just a little? It’s pretty disruptive for everyone else.”

    If they were assholes, I’d then chew them out and complain to staff.

    Not saying that’s the most mature route tho…

    • adrian783@lemmy.world
      141·
      10 months ago

      I would never confront a group of loud people alone. afterall, they already proved themselves to be inconsiderate.

      just ask a server to handle it.

            • nyctre@lemmy.world
              3·
              10 months ago

              But you already have to talk to the waiter to get you the manager, right? What’s the difference if you tell the staff directly your issue and they relay the message to the manager(or they’ve already been through this and they know how to handle it) or if you speak to the manager privately?

            • adrian783@lemmy.world
              41·
              10 months ago

              you don’t think people literally expect the bus boy to handle it right? really try to use your fucking brain for a second.

    • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
      2·
      10 months ago

      I’d say if they are rude in reply to straight to staff. Chewing them out yourself is an easy way to get in a fight.

  • LemmyIsFantastic@lemmy.world
    1362·
    10 months ago

    You ask the staff? God I’m going to sound like a boomer but what the fuck is gen z learning growing up? This is real basic shit.

    • Emma_Gold_Man@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      262·
      10 months ago

      Insulting people for trying to learn is not a great way to encourage learning.

      Also consider that growing up, people are kids. Kids are the rowdy ones in a restaurant, so they don’t get to see how their parents handle the situation until they’re older. Combined with a few years of pandemics related reductions to in-restaurant dining, it’s totally understandable that a youngish adult wouldn’t know the best thing to do - unless they ask.

      Which you just disincentivised.

      In a community whose entire purpose is supposed to be to provide a safe space for asking such questions.

    • GiantFloppyCock@lemm.ee
      258·
      10 months ago

      You sound like a boomer because you’re answering it like a condescending dick. Could have simply said “ask the staff”.

      Edit: removed the following text because it was interpreted as an attack(?):

      “Anyway, I hope you have a nice day. I’m going for a walk to enjoy the cold air.”

      • DarkNightoftheSoul@mander.xyzEnglish
        924·
        10 months ago

        You also sound patronizing and condescending here.

        Edit: They have edited their comment to no longer be patronizing.

          • DarkNightoftheSoul@mander.xyzEnglish
            68·
            10 months ago

            Oh, you edited out the part where you said the other party should take a walk. That’s a weird thing to do, because with that edit my “you also sound patronizing here” seems bizarrely out-of-place. Hey, you flipped the narrative and got the upvotes back though, so good job gaming the comments I guess.

            • GiantFloppyCock@lemm.ee
              52·
              10 months ago

              I actually originally added that part because I decided I wanted to try to be nice and was genuinely trying to be positive, not sarcastic, patronizing, or condescending.

              My original post said that I was going to take a walk, and wished them a nice day. Which is literally what I did and meant.

              But after seeing that this was interpreted as some sort of attack, I removed it.

              So I’ll add it again - I genuinely hope you and the others in this weirdly negative thread have a nice day, because maybe you’re going through some shit and need some positivity.

              • DarkNightoftheSoul@mander.xyzEnglish
                26·
                10 months ago

                My original post said…

                Shame we don’t have some sort of record of that.

                trying to be nice

                Eh, get fucked.

                I’m getting some mixed messages here.

                Edit: “You’re weird and negative, here’s some good vibez that should fix you lol byeeee” patronizing hypocrite

                • JackbyDev@programming.devEnglish
                  2·
                  10 months ago

                  What an exhausting conversation. It was a miscommunication. Just move on. It’s a Lemmy comment. It doesn’t deserve this level of scrutiny.

                • GiantFloppyCock@lemm.ee
                  1·
                  10 months ago

                  Sorry, I’m trying really hard here. I did not call you weird, just saying that the whole thread in general felt weirdly hostile. Granted, I told you to get fucked after seeing that my attempts to turn this around were failing, which obviously did not help.

                  So I’ll try one last time. Sorry for telling you to get fucked, that obviously was counter productive. But whether you like it or not, I’m still going to wish you a good day.

      • rdyoung@lemmy.world
        734·
        10 months ago

        Oh look, it’s one of the younglings who can’t hear the truth because it hurts your fee fees.

        Dude/dudette is right. This is basic life shit like paying your own bills, finding a place to rent, buying your own groceries, cooking your own food (instead of eating delivery or going out for every meal, etc).

        And I’m sure this will bring some ire too but boomer is a specific generation. If you are under 25 good chance the boomers in your family are your great grandparents and it’s your parents (gen x) that should have taught you this life stuff as well as how to deal with other people online and off. Even if boomer was a mindset like some younglings seem to think, the above comment comes nowhere near it and those who throw this around instead of actually conversing and learning something new have most definitely not met a “boomer”. That generation was full of hippies, potheads, etc.

        For the record I straddle x and millennial but have more in common with x despite my distain for the use of generations like this outside of population studies and academia.

    • Lmaydev@programming.dev
      2·
      10 months ago

      Their age isn’t mentioned in the post is it?

      Given they have kids it’s much more likely to be millennials.

      Also their behaviour is more a reflection of the generation that raised them.

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
      1·
      10 months ago

      Overwhelming politeness and awkwardness with intruding on others in this case. Gen Z seems to really struggle with feeling that they have the right to take up space.

    • Black_Gulaman@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      513·
      10 months ago

      They don’t know shit because they’re always on the phone and lacks social interaction, hence, low levels of actual street smarts.

    • rdyoung@lemmy.world
      721·
      10 months ago

      You don’t sound like a boomer. Stop using that term like that. You stated a truth. A truth that a large number of younglings don’t want to accept. I’m not sure I remember anyone being as sensitive to the truth and so adverse to expanding their horizons as I’ve seen over the past decade or so.

      It’s a big big problem with online discourse. People can’t take simple statements of fact and don’t know how to take something at face value without “reading between the lines” and seeing hostility where there is none. Maybe it’s a perk of being on the spectrum but more people should strive to be a bit autistic sometimes, it would help especially online and in real life dealing with strangers, coworkers, etc.