• Smorty [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    23·
    10 months ago

    But what if I’m faking it to get attention, even though that is really unlike me and I don’t seek attention? What if that’s my subconscious trying to be more important then it is? That’s where it gets spoopy

  • jballsEnglish
    20·
    10 months ago

    I didn’t even notice the community this was posted in at first. I just thought this was good advice for dealing with imposter syndrome.

  • First Majestic Comet@lemmy.blahaj.zoneMEnglish
    7·
    10 months ago

    IMO It is not possible to fake gender identity, for that there would need to be provisions to selectively invalidate people for how they claim to identify. This is not compatible with the idea that the way people identify as being valid, because it introduces scenarios where you can override this and say they aren’t valid.

    On the opposite side of the spectrum this also means that it is disgustingly unethical to try and call people out as being “in-denial” or an “egg” for their violations against gender norms, that would be going against their stated identity and invalidating it.

    If the idea that gender identity is valid and should be respected holds true these points of invalidation are just as wrong or hurtful as any form of invalidation, and such cannot be justified, a person isn’t “pretending to be [gender]” nor are they an “egg”, what they say is final until they say otherwise, and that is how it should be, because if people can be invalidated in these situation, they can be invalidated in others by making it seem like they are these situations. This already happens by people saying trans people are faking it, or by saying fem presenting transmascs and enbies are really girls in denial.

    • good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      7·
      10 months ago

      To add on, there’s a really messed up study where a doctor tried to instill a gender identity to a child where it was incongruent the child’s gender identity and it did not work whatsoever.

      You know who and what you are internally, despite social gaslighting and conditioning trying to tell you otherwise.

        • Soullioness@lemmy.ca
          1·
          10 months ago

          That’s quite interesting in an awful way. Do you remember any details like the name of the documentary or of who did that?

          • First Majestic Comet@lemmy.blahaj.zoneMEnglish
            4·
            10 months ago

            The Doctor’s name was John Money, he was a Sexologist working at the Kinsey institute, the boy’s name was David Reimer. David’s parents went to see Dr. Money after a botched circumcision who decided to use that situation to test his theory of nature vs nurture (he believed that Gender identity was maluable when people are young) and had them reassign David as a girl, and said it was key that David never be told he was born a boy. Yeah pretty fucked up stuff.

            If you want to see it yourself the documentary was BBC Horizon, episode was called “The Boy who was Turned into a Girl”, it has not aged well, they use the word “Transsexual” in it to describe trans women.

      • zea@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        2·
        10 months ago

        I wish I was as certain in my identity as you’re implying is normal. I’m also autistic, so that might be why I struggle with it.

        • good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone
          3·
          10 months ago

          I think being uncertain is as normal as being certain. The message I was trying to get across however is that it’s an internal process and nobody can tell you you’re wrong. Obviously there is an internal struggle as well because identity is something so inherent to the human experience that when your identity is challenged in a serious way, there’s going to be some level of dissonance.

          Struggling is fine. You’re not abnormal, I promise. It’s just a process because questioning your own identity means you’re going against the social expectation of ‘normality’. Despite being on HRT myself, and ‘coming out’ to myself internally years before starting my transition, I still find myself having those thoughts of self-doubt.