Hmm, I don’t know. Seems like the perfect instrument to make “nerdy” kids feel even more insecure. Having very good grades is something you absolutely can and should be proud of. This does not automatically mean that your children, if they do not have good grades, are less valuable or “good” per se. But I think that the reasoning employed in the screenshot makes it very easy to say “Yes, your child’s grades are good, but my kid is way cooler”, belittling an entire and very respectable achievement of the other person.
Eh, I think it’s good to make sure kids don’t pin their self esteem on anything overly tangible.
Grades are something that’s inherently tied to cultural capital. If your parents are able to teach you the skills needed to succeed in academic subjects, you’re going to do better. Pinning kids’ self worth to grades often leads to kids with disadvantages like a disrupted home life becoming disillusioned with the education system and suffering as a result.
I got good grades; I do not think the grades themselves are anything to be especially proud about. What’s more important is the effort that went into getting them, and that’s something more worth focusing on.
A parent saying they think their kid is cool is a value judgement from their perspective. They have a child they enjoy spending time with and with whom they have a good relationship. That’s something that I think anyone can get behind.
What’s cultural capital? Do you mean regular money? Grades are definitely tied to regular money, from how quiet it is in your neighborhood at night (how much sleep you can get), to access to food and healthcare, to tutoring and prep courses.
I think, in this context “cultural capital” refers to one’s social standing in their community. The higher the cultural capital one has, the higher one is in the social hierarchy, generally.
Good grades -> seen favorably by those around you -> higher social standing (increased cultural capital)
It’s not really social standing – it’s more the knowledge and behaviours that permit you a certain social standing. Apologies in advance for repeating the quote from the other comment:
In the field of sociology, cultural capital comprises the social assets of a person (education, intellect, style of speech, style of dress, social capital, etc.) that promote social mobility in a stratified society
In the field of sociology, cultural capital comprises the social assets of a person (education, intellect, style of speech, style of dress, social capital, etc.) that promote social mobility in a stratified society
Taking an example: I had a friend at university that did classics. There is no possible way I could have known growing up that classics was even an option; my school didn’t teach it, and it wasn’t something I’d come across at home beyond reading Percy Jackson. So my friend had far more of that kind of cultural capital than I did.
I don’t think it’s “cool” the way like…90s teen movies meant cool. I think it’s more like, “are they a kind person who is enjoyable to be around?” You can have other achievements that look good on paper and be cool. You can be an awkward dork and still be cool in that sense. Unfortunately, some parents prize the resume over raising a decent human being, and some kids end up being assholes, which is not cool at all.
As an incredibly and habitually nerdy kid none of my nerd shit had been an obstacle to my parents thinking I’m rad. I taught and ran my Mom through a D&D campaign over Covid…
Also I don’t think a parent who adopts the 'Is your kid cool" mentality is looking to make it another vector to disparage kids but to open adults minds to actually appreciating their kids as people not just little self congratulatory vicarious vindication of success. My parents are not fans of my Brother-in-Law’s family because they refuse to look at their son and my sibling as success on any other metric than acedemic or career related successes. They look at their careers in slightly lower paid but fulfilling careers doing things they feel make the world a better place makes them “the dumbest smart people we know”… The fact their son is just fucking awesome in his own merits just never enters their heads (and makes my Mom mad enough to bite through steel.)
I think the key message the dad was saying wasn’t so much that his kids are cool but that he thinks they are awesome and that he likes to hang out with them because they have an amazing personality. “Cool” was just a term to make it sound less tacky
Hmm, I don’t know. Seems like the perfect instrument to make “nerdy” kids feel even more insecure. Having very good grades is something you absolutely can and should be proud of. This does not automatically mean that your children, if they do not have good grades, are less valuable or “good” per se. But I think that the reasoning employed in the screenshot makes it very easy to say “Yes, your child’s grades are good, but my kid is way cooler”, belittling an entire and very respectable achievement of the other person.
Being nerdy and getting good grades doesn’t preclude being cool, especially not these days.
cries in growing up in the 90s
Eh, I think it’s good to make sure kids don’t pin their self esteem on anything overly tangible.
Grades are something that’s inherently tied to cultural capital. If your parents are able to teach you the skills needed to succeed in academic subjects, you’re going to do better. Pinning kids’ self worth to grades often leads to kids with disadvantages like a disrupted home life becoming disillusioned with the education system and suffering as a result.
I got good grades; I do not think the grades themselves are anything to be especially proud about. What’s more important is the effort that went into getting them, and that’s something more worth focusing on.
A parent saying they think their kid is cool is a value judgement from their perspective. They have a child they enjoy spending time with and with whom they have a good relationship. That’s something that I think anyone can get behind.
What’s cultural capital? Do you mean regular money? Grades are definitely tied to regular money, from how quiet it is in your neighborhood at night (how much sleep you can get), to access to food and healthcare, to tutoring and prep courses.
I think, in this context “cultural capital” refers to one’s social standing in their community. The higher the cultural capital one has, the higher one is in the social hierarchy, generally.
Good grades -> seen favorably by those around you -> higher social standing (increased cultural capital)
it does have a specific sociological meaning :).
It’s not really social standing – it’s more the knowledge and behaviours that permit you a certain social standing. Apologies in advance for repeating the quote from the other comment:
Thanks for the info!
Sociology bullshit, don’t worry about it.
Not exactly.
Taking an example: I had a friend at university that did classics. There is no possible way I could have known growing up that classics was even an option; my school didn’t teach it, and it wasn’t something I’d come across at home beyond reading Percy Jackson. So my friend had far more of that kind of cultural capital than I did.
I don’t think it’s “cool” the way like…90s teen movies meant cool. I think it’s more like, “are they a kind person who is enjoyable to be around?” You can have other achievements that look good on paper and be cool. You can be an awkward dork and still be cool in that sense. Unfortunately, some parents prize the resume over raising a decent human being, and some kids end up being assholes, which is not cool at all.
As an incredibly and habitually nerdy kid none of my nerd shit had been an obstacle to my parents thinking I’m rad. I taught and ran my Mom through a D&D campaign over Covid…
Also I don’t think a parent who adopts the 'Is your kid cool" mentality is looking to make it another vector to disparage kids but to open adults minds to actually appreciating their kids as people not just little self congratulatory vicarious vindication of success. My parents are not fans of my Brother-in-Law’s family because they refuse to look at their son and my sibling as success on any other metric than acedemic or career related successes. They look at their careers in slightly lower paid but fulfilling careers doing things they feel make the world a better place makes them “the dumbest smart people we know”… The fact their son is just fucking awesome in his own merits just never enters their heads (and makes my Mom mad enough to bite through steel.)
Having parents who are cool is a blessing.
Good point. Good personality is trait as is academic success.
I think the key message the dad was saying wasn’t so much that his kids are cool but that he thinks they are awesome and that he likes to hang out with them because they have an amazing personality. “Cool” was just a term to make it sound less tacky