• sugar_in_your_tea
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      3 months ago

      When they need one. And no, that’s not when they say they need one, but when you decide they need one.

      I’m planning on having a loaner phone when my kids are teenagers that they can share. It’ll stay home unless they leave the house, and they’ll be limited to how much time they can spend on it. If they earn my trust, maybe they’ll get their own (again, subject to limitations). I don’t see a reason why they’d need one before they can drive, but I’ll play it by ear.

      That said, I refuse to do any sort of tracking on their devices. If I trust them with a phone, I’ll respect their privacy with it. If they violate my trust, they lose the phone. If they don’t like it, they’re free to get their own once they’re 18, and not a day before.

        • sugar_in_your_tea
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          3 months ago

          Yeah, yikes for being a parent that wants to teach their kids prudence. While they’re living in my home, a phone is a privilege, not a right, and they need to prove they can be trusted with it. If they break that trust, they lose the phone.

          I’m not giving them a phone because their friends have phones, I’m giving them a phone because I trust them with it and there’s a reasonable reason for them to have it. I don’t need to know where my child is 24/7, I just need to know that they’ll be home at a given time and not break our rules when I’m not around, and I need trust for that to happen, not a tracking device.

    • biggerbogboy
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      3 months ago

      As a 17 year old who has 3 phones (somewhat strange story behind it), giving a child a phone should be either when they need it, such as when they go out more often or other events where they need a specific use, but if not, I believe 18 to 20 is not a bad age to receive one, since young adults are more likely to need to travel to schooling such as UNI more often and generally need more info about travel routes and to be able to message parents/siblings/etc.

      As for my 3 phones, one is a galaxy S4 my dad gave me as a hand-me-down, pretty much used to text my parents exclusively, then I received an oppo Reno z from a friend who didn’t need it, which I currently use as a games and social media phone, then the third is one is a galaxy a20 my dad brought home and said I could take if I wanted, since there were a few of those unused at his workplace, so I now just use that as a flashlight.

      • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        3 months ago

        You can’t exist in this world without a phone anymore.
        Any meaningful school relationship builds on things like messaging groups.
        Just because we could do it in the early 2000s doesnt mean it’s applicable today.

        This would today socially cripple a student.

        • biggerbogboy
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          3 months ago

          I guess it lands differently in other parts of the world and is more nuanced than I previously anticipated, since, where I live we are quite agnostic between devices to message with, some use phones, some use tablets, some use laptops, and it goes on. As for my friend group, none of us communicated using phones until mid 2022, two years into our friendships.

          Since we all moved to our senior campus, we are just now emphasising smartphones as a daily method of communication, compared to our previous default, laptops and desktops, but we normally use the same apps/sites we used to, specifically discord and Instagram.

          Again, I believe it depends on the area, maybe in other parts they use phones much more often compared to us, or some may never use phones at all.

          • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            3 months ago

            Oh certainly!
            I would say my take would more or less apply to most of west Europe and north America and maybe some parts of heavily urbanized parts of Asia. But that is only guessing.
            My location is in Germany so take that information for what it is :)

            • biggerbogboy
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              3 months ago

              I definitely agree, though I’d also add the Australia/New Zealand region as well, since we are also reasonably heavy users of phones too. Also I’m from Victoria, Australia by the way, it’s pretty fascinating how diverse the internet is :)

    • ipkpjersi@lemmy.ml
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      3 months ago

      IMO 16, if you can trust them to be responsible enough to drive you can trust them to have a smartphone. If you can’t trust them to drive then yeah they probably shouldn’t have a smartphone lol

      • Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        3 months ago

        I’d say 13-14 under tighter supervision but 15 is the range where they will be made fun of for heli parents.
        And they will quickly find a way around it like resetting the whole phone if nothing else.

    • brian@programming.dev
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      3 months ago

      I feel like I had a problem socially starting jr high without a phone at all in late 00s. All your friends communicate/plan/etc over phones so not having one you’re missing out on all of that.

      Smartphone is debatable, but I feel like 6/7th grade kinda needs a phone of some sort in current society