I got a COVID infection a while ago that permanently disabled me pretty bad. Bedridden, unable to move much, etc.

The thing that really helped me was relaxing and listening to music. That’s what I spent my days doing as I couldn’t do much else. I became a real music nerd and just loved the bliss of hearing music.

A little later (two years). I got another COVID infection — I was taking very strong precautions, and couldn’t see anyone. It turns out I got it from my doctor. Anyways, this infection caused some brain damage which has caused me to mostly loose the ability to hear. And now I’m still mostly motionless alone in bed, but I haven’t even got the comfort of sound or music. Just a mostly silent (tinnitus filled) world.

I’m so scared of getting covid again. But mostly I miss the world and my old life. Being stuck alone in bed with only the internet for company sucks. People tend to be arseholes online. I can’t help but feel I got “natural selectioned”. Me and my wife were planning on having kids soon. Now I barely see her and I’m going to slowly die in a nursing home. There are specific genetic vulnerabilities to illnesses, and natural selection works with them (see what Europeans coming to America did). And I got fucked here. COVID was my end.

  • LouNeko@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    It absolutely sucks that this happened to you, I would literary not wish your fate on anybody in the world. I won’t use this to tell my own sob story, but have you tried getting into video games? Most have accessibility features. Get “Factorio” it basically runs on a potato and you will unironicaly forget what the sun looks like. Sound is not important either.

    • Ultraviolet@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I’d wish it on COVID deniers who think anyone who caught it and didn’t die is “fine”. They absolutely deserve that fate.

      • LouNeko@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Nah dog, as somebody who’s experienced only a fraction of soul crushing loneliness and isolation, I wouldn’t wish it on anybody. Nothing makes you feel less human.