I’m not really looking to hear from people who don’t think this way, with answers like “insecurity”, “toxic masculinity”, etc. I want to hear answers from men who really detest men who sit to pee.

Follow-up questions:

  • when you have to piss while shitting, do you stand up turn around and piss on your shit and then sit back down to finish shitting?
  • are you ever groggy in the morning?
  • how clean is your toilet and surrounding floor, and whose job is cleaning it?
  • what are your true passions in life?
  • kyle@lemm.ee
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    2 hours ago

    Years ago a Psych episode had Burton say “all the men’s health journals agree” that it’s better for your circulation, and I never looked back (nor fact checked).

  • sin_free_for_00_days@sopuli.xyz
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    3 hours ago

    I don’t know who y’all hang out with, but my friends for decades have given each other shit for anything we can possibly think of. It’s a form of male bonding.

  • doggle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 hours ago

    You’re not going to hear from men who actually do this because they don’t have a good reason and aren’t typically comfortable with the kind of introspection the question demands.

    Some people are exclusionary pricks who look for excuses to judge others. They don’t have or need a reason. It’s bullying.

    • silly goose meekah@lemmy.world
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      4 minutes ago

      In German there’s an insult: “Sitzpinkler”. It means “someone who sits down when peeing”. Never heard anyone use it seriously though.

  • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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    3 hours ago

    I actually can’t pee with other people in the room, so public washrooms are a nightmare. But I learned that I can pee real easy in them while I’m sitting down to take a shit. So anytime I’m in one with other people, I just chill in the stall and pretend to take a shit. Might even fiddle with toilet paper after a while and flush just to keep the charade going.

    Well, through that I learned that sitting to piss feels waayyyy fucking better. Especially in the middle of the night after crawling out of bed. I’m married, have a kid, and no longer care if people know I sometimes sit to pee.

    • Doug Holland@lemmy.world
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      1 hour ago

      Also (sorry, but old guy here) the nozzle sometimes unexpectedly sprays sideways. It’s no worry if you’re sitting down, but if you’re standing up you might’ve just wet your pants… or the pants of the unlucky schmoe at the neighboring urinal.

    • JasonDJ@lemmy.zip
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      8 minutes ago

      Ugh, me, with a shy bladder, at intermission during Hamilton.

      My eyes were turning yellow at Guns and Ships. Really thought I wouldn’t make it. The line at the men’s room was huge. Get in. Get to urinal. Can’t.

      Ugh.

      End up leaving with bladder still full and getting back into line to get a stall and finish just in time. Couldn’t even get another overpriced beer for the second act.

  • gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 hours ago

    I don’t shame people for it, but I worked at a place where the screw holding the seat broke and it took a week for a new one to get in to the local hardware shop, so any time someone went in for that week someone would say “better not sit to piss” rather than be helpful because we like to do a little trolling around here

    One morning dude comes in clearly rushing cuz he’s a little late, runs in, and my coworker says the line. Before he can finish it the guys already in the shitter with the door slammed we hear the zipper he’s going so fast and furious, hear his ass hit the seat at speed, as well as him and the seat sliding from the missing bolt and falling into the corner of the room, taking the lid of the reservoir with him

    The “GYADDAMIT” as everything in the other room crashed and banged will be with me til I die, it makes me chuckle every time I think of it

  • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
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    5 hours ago

    As a man WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME HOW YOU PEE!?! What god damn conversation is going on!?! How the hell did this come up? We don’t normally talk about this!

    My true passion in life is Aztec history.

  • johannesvanderwhales@lemmy.world
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    5 hours ago

    I mostly sit down when I pee because my cat likes to spend quality time when I’m on the toilet and he gets upset if into in the bathroom and don’t sit down.

    Remember manliness is not caring about how other people define manliness.

  • Cyborganism@lemmy.ca
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    9 hours ago

    Guys who do diss other guys for not peeing standing up have major self esteem issues or insecurities.

    I’m a man and I pee sitting down because:

    • it’s more comfortable
    • it doesn’t splash pee water everywhere all over the toilet bowl and the floor or my pants.
    • can access the toilet paper easier to wipe clean instead of just shaking it and having a wet pee stain on my underwear
    • I have my hands free to use my phone
    • I can also fight anyone that might barge in an try to assault me while I pee without peeing on myself so it’s a tactical defense position.
    • timroerstroem@feddit.dk
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      4 hours ago

      I’m a man and I pee sitting down because:

      it’s more comfortable
      

      Agreed, I will generally sit down.

      It’s solely a matter of comfort and/or convenience:

      • No. 2: Toilet (obviously, I hope).
      • No. 1 on the road or at the pub: Urinal or standing elsewhere.
      • No. 1 otherwise: sit down and relax.
    • JohnnyCanuck@lemmy.ca
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      8 hours ago

      Real men sit to pee so they don’t have to clean their own piss up later.

      Whenever I talk about this, some asshat will come along and make a comment about sitting on a tree. No, dumbass, I don’t sit to pee on a tree. Or a urinal. I sit to pee on my toilet at home so I can tell you what an idiot you are while I’m pissing just to prove how manly I am.

    • Agrivar@lemmy.world
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      6 hours ago

      I can also fight anyone that might barge in an try to assault me while I pee without peeing on myself so it’s a tactical defense position.

      Bruh. You’re giving up your best offensive maneuver by sitting down! You piss AT your attacker!

    • babybus
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      5 hours ago

      How long do you pee that you have time to acces your phone though?

      • ricecake
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        3 hours ago

        Usually about 15 to 20 seconds. I’ve been known to check my phone while standing to pee, it really just depends on what I’m doing It’s not like I’m doing a lot on my phone while peeing.

      • Cyborganism@lemmy.ca
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        7 hours ago

        So do you pee with your dick bent backwards between your butt cheeks to piss in the bowl while you face the door?

    • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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      8 hours ago

      You fool, the pee is to be used as a standoff weapon to assert space and give time to determine your strategy.

      • Cyborganism@lemmy.ca
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        7 hours ago

        If your attacker comes from behind, which is the most likely scenario, you’ll be caught off guard with both hands busy holding your junk. All they gotta do is shake you a little for you to be covered in your own piss. Checkmate.

  • Boozilla@lemmy.world
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    9 hours ago

    “What is that? An umbrella? Are you afraid of a little rain? Are you gay? What’s the umbrella for, so you can stick it up your ass?”

    I’m ripping off Bill Burr here. Macho men are drooling morons who die at age 54. Why ask them their opinion on anything?

  • nimpnin@sopuli.xyz
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    7 hours ago

    They can be fucking annoying. Like we get it, you sit down and think you’re somehow superior for being different. Otherwise I take no issue with them.

  • stinerman [Ohio]@midwest.social
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    8 hours ago

    I want to hear answers from men who really detest men who sit to pee.

    I fear that you will not many of these kinds of people on Lemmy. If you really want a good answer, you’d have to post it somewhere like Twitter or Truth Social.

  • breadsmasher@lemmy.world
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    10 hours ago

    I cant ever recall a time I have questioned, or been questioned, as to why a guy would sit to pee. I sit at home because its more comfortable. I stand at public toilets because the seats are gross

    • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.de
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      8 hours ago

      I’ve only been questioned once about sitting to pee… it was after about 10 years of being married. My wife asked one day if I sit while peeing at home, and when I told her that I do she said “I’ve always wondered why there isn’t pee all over our bathrooms”.

      • Halosheep@lemm.ee
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        7 hours ago

        This leads me to two questions:

        Do you guys often miss while standing and, if you do, not clean up after?

        When you’re sitting do you not have an issue with the pee splashing UP the side of the bowl onto the seat? I have this happen often.

        • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.de
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          3 hours ago

          Do you guys often miss while standing and, if you do, not clean up after?

          Yes… and, sadly, not always. Just take a look around a urinal (which shouldn’t be difficult at all to miss) and I don’t think this is just a ‘me’ issue.

          When you’re sitting do you not have an issue with the pee splashing UP the side of the bowl onto the seat? I have this happen often.

          The biggest issue I typically have is the toilet water is really cold if I accidentally hang down into it, but I normally don’t have a problem with pee hitting the sides of the bowl.

          edit: formatting