• ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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    1 个月前

    70-80% of sex addiction is just people being shamed for their normal sexual needs that are more than jsut “wanting to have children”, mainly thanks to religious zealots secular washing their activism of forcing people to live according to their religious morals, but nowadays we also have the myth of semen retention.

    • no banana@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 个月前

      That is true! Sex addiction is fascinating, just like porn addiction. Because it seems to be very much about shame and very little about actual addiction.

    • paultimate14@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      In my experience the people who describe themselves as “sex addicts” are people who were caught hurting their loved ones and trying to excuse their behavior, either socially (cheaters) or legally (rapists).

      Somewhat adjacent, I have heard of people claiming “sex addiction” to pressure their partners into more sex than they would otherwise want. Apparently there’s a whole section of feminists who believe that “blue balls” is completely made up by men, because it’s really common for men to claim blue balls is a more serious issue than it is. I’ve had to explain to multiple women in my life that it is both real and just a minor inconvenience.

      You’re not wrong about the religious zealots, I just wanted to bring up that there’s a TON of sex disinformation being spread by different people for different goals. And “sex addiction” is particularly ripe for such disinformation.

      • Synapse@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        About blue balls, it’s not entirely made up. I’ve experienced it myself. Except:

        1. It’s discomfort, not terrible pain. It can last few minutes to a couple hours max
        2. It’s not guaranteed to happen
        3. If it’s use as an excuse to pressure your partner into having sex, then it’s abuse.
        • Fisch@discuss.tchncs.de
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          1 个月前

          I’m a guy and I have no idea what that is. Does that happen when you don’t have sex for a longer amount of time or what? And couldn’t you just jack off?

          • Synapse@lemmy.world
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            1 个月前

            It’s testicular discomfort after being sexually exited for a while (with erection) but the act does not take place or you are not able to finish. You absolutely can blue-ball yourself btw.

            Another important note: nothing actually turns blue.

            Edit: further details

            • once you have blue-balls, jacking off won’t help. All you can do it wait.
            • I’ve also experienced blue-balls even though I finished, when things are rushed, either by myself or with a partner.
        • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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          1 个月前

          Ball-haver here, and agreed. Balls also hurt for a variety of reasons. Sometimes just gently elbowing yourself can lead to a dull ache that leaves you squirming.

          Anecdotally ball pain does not sound nearly as bad as period cramps - and people are expected to go to work with those!

    • Aneb@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      My religious zealot father took me to Sex Addicts Anonymous because I was jerking it to gay porn. So yes to what you said

      • Entropywins@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        I remember when I was first going through recovery, I went to a church that was recommended. The amount of teenage boys there for porn/sex addiction was crazy. Half of us were there for sticking needles in our arms. The other half liked to spank it, and as far as I’m concerned, perfectly, normal teenagers.