I only speak cantonese at home, for most of contact with society, it was English, when in the US, or during the few early years of my life in China, it was Mandarin. (But now it’s just English, since its the US)
And my parents are… not very nice parents…
Emotionally abusive for my entire life, and, during the early years of my life, used “corporal punishment”, but only stopped because I got older and can defend myself.
But still constantly being emotionally abusive.
And deny that my (diagnosed) depression exists, while accusing me of “faking” it. While simultaneously threatening to hospitalize me.
Also my (older) brother (who also speaks cantonese at home) is a major douchbag, very abusive to me, especially when I was younger.
grandparents are passive agressive
Like, I kinda just hate Cantonese. I mean, almost every interaction in Cantonese is with an abusive person. And with how closely related Mandarin is to Cantonese, I kinda hate Mandarin too. There’s just so much conservative culture that’s attached to Chinese languages, everytime I hear someone talk in Chinese, especially Cantonese, I kinda feel fear, I feel like my parents are nearby and are yelling at me.
I mean, with English interactions, there’s like half good half bad interactions
With cantonese, its like almost 100% bad interactions
So like… 🤷♂️
At a previous workplace one of my coworkers had an abuse trigger of hearing gum chewed - they didn’t explain in detail (and I didn’t ask) but clearly they’d been through a rough enough time that they asked people sitting near them to refrain from having gum in the office.
I, personally, loathe the specific shade of orange associated with Halloween for my own private reasons.
When we have a strong negative experience, especially if that experience is continuous over a long time. It’s perfectly fair to be triggered emotionally by things you associate with that experience - it’s not fair to others to show them hate for traits they share with the people who gave you those negative experiences but your reaction to those triggers are valid. I want to clarify that last sentence, for some people it’s impossible not to feel strong emotions when exposed to a trigger like that - but you should be rationally aware that people you meet on the street who speak Cantonese are not your family members and did not cause you that pain. If you find yourself in a painful situation you should try to remove yourself from that situation if possible or make people aware of your emotions if possible prior to expressing your emotions on someone unaware. With the triggering action being a language that will be especially difficult since it’s likely to be perceived as xenophobia so I’d stress trying to remove yourself from a situation if you’re feeling strong emotions.