I (20M) am currently interested in a girl named G,19F, who goes to the same college as me, we hit it off rather well and I’m trying to get to know her more. however recently she became buddies with someone I know, R(don’t know his age), he is someone who I admittedly don’t know too well but I can tell he wants G. he managed to get her number and the two are talking a lot and he’s taking her to get food between classes. I just found this out not too long ago and I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a car, I don’t know how to drive, I am broke constantly due to loaning out money to my family for one reason or another. I simply can’t compete and it hurts too much, I can’t stop thinking of the two of them together. and how much better R is than me. I’m thinking about cutting G off because of this, i feel some unhealthy amounts of aggression towards both of them and i can tell my jealousy will grow from here.
Yes, I agree that you’re overreacting. I suggest you nip this in the bud ASAP, though, if you want to have healthy relationships.
Jealousy comes from insecurity. This torturous feeling will keep happening until you work on building your own self-confidence and learn healthy coping methods. If you can’t see a therapist, I’m sure there are plenty of resources and shared experiences online that you can gain insight from the start with, at least.
I’m glad that you sense that this is bringing out some alarming feelings in you. It might be a good idea to back off until you address them, even though I know that’d be painful too. You really do NOT want to let that kind of shit fester, though.
This is also a great idea. Don’t let yourself indulge i n brooding over this, as brooding is not attractive to women, not even if you’re Batman. :) Self-examination and self-improvement are more likely to help attract the people you want into your circle. You already have honesty about yourself, which is a great first step!