Oh no, my miserable life that’s devoid of any connection and anyone altogether otherwise *at least contains a friend.

What the fuck man, is this a real concern average people have that I’m way too fucking alienated to understand

  • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    it’s completely disingenuous to remain “friends” with someone after you’ve been friendzoned

    This kind of pre-emptive antagonism between people in the dating pool only makes it gradually more antagonistic over time.

    It’s already rare enough for cishet men to have nonromantic friendships with cishet women; making it more antagonistic over time by normalizing fear and anger about “friendzoning” only makes that a little worse for everyone as time goes on.

    • christiansocialist [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      I expanded on what I meant in the rest of the sentence (since you only quoted part of it and not the whole).

      It’s already rare enough for cishet men to have nonromantic friendships with cishet women; making it more antagonistic over time by normalizing fear and anger about “friendzoning” only makes that a little worse for everyone as time goes on.

      Yeah I agree that the fear and anger shouldn’t be normalized, but we should also normalize being open about our feelings and not suppressing them and remaining “friends” while still holding hope that it will become something more (which I also think can be super dangerous). I expanded on that in a reply to someone else if you wanna see it.

      • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        but we should also normalize being open about our feelings and not suppressing them

        No arguments from me here.

        remaining “friends”

        This is still possible, and I have done it, no scare quotes needed.

        while still holding hope that it will become something more

        Now this is the toxic part that fucks it all up and makes the friendship impossible if it’s held that way.

        It really is possible to be attracted to someone and accept that the other person isn’t attracted back and still be nonromantic friends. I have done it, and I still have those friendships many years later.