Addendum:
Chirp-chirp-chirp. Pleasing to the ears, but clearly signifies your cat’s desire to murder. 6/10
Hork hork hork. Grab some paper towels, you get to clean up a hairball. Maybe it won’t be on your shoes this time. 0/10

Cat sounds, translated

mrow? where’s my food/attention? I’m asking nicely.

purr: my needs are met and I’m happy.

silent judgement: this is my default setting.

mow-wow-wow: you’ve exceeded my expectations. (quite rare, enjoy it because you’ve earned it!)

AAAAAAAA: something is wrong. good luck figuring out what.

rrrrrrrrrrr!: something is very wrong. good luck figuring out what.

mrrp: you’re pleasing me. keep doing that.

the classic yodel: nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen.

the classic yodel after 1AM: everyone’s a critic.

There’s also a less common, lower pitched “ohh?” sound, which I’ve learned means, “you have seven seconds before I throw up on your bed.”

Removed by mod

One of our cats goes into “poor, unloved kitty” mode sometimes. It’s a long mrrrroooowww that makes you think he’s feeling all of the sadness in the world.

It’s like, “Dude, we’re upstairs. Come up and cuddle with us.” (We work from home, and our offices are upstairs.)

We also used to have a female gray tabby that was a sound engineer. She’d find the places in the house that would echo her meows the loudest and let loose there. The house is so quiet since she passed, and we have other cats and a dog. On conference calls, it was much more likely you’d hear her than the dog or the other cats. (The dog has a louder bark, but he rarely uses it.)

There’s also:

• a loud moww moooowww - “look, I hunted it!”. Usually in front of a toy. 9/10 before you went to bed, 0/10 after.
• a pigeon-like prrrww prrwwwOOOWWW - 6/10 because it’s funny but it reminds you that you got to pay the vet some money to neuter your female.

How is silent judgment not a cat sound?

I’m pretty sure cats invented it.