I’ve been having a dought. It’s a small nagging one but it’s there.
I’ve been working a lot with my therapist on self hate issues, but I can acknowledge them.
I realized I can never really be in any kind of physical relationship with somone because of this. I’m repulsed by myself and perhaps my asexuality is just a result of that.
I wonder if I am so repulsed by myself that the idea of me being with anyone is rejected because of the “me” part and not how I feel towards others. Where some may think “I want to kiss that person” I can’t bare the thought if subjecting somone to me in that way. And therefore the thought is gross.
Does anyone else deal with this? Any advice?
The world desperately needs more counselors If it’s where you want to be I really hope you find a way into it.
I know, and it’s something that I would be very well suited for, I feel. I just don’t know how to find my way into it. All of my education is far away from that field, but I’ve always had deep interest in people, the mind, and mental health. I get imposter syndrome doing work I am very skilled and knowledgeable in, just looking at getting into counseling gives me imposter syndrome.
That one would have a lot of volunteer opportunities. It’s be a good way to network and get a sense of what you’d be getting into with far less pressure.
Though I notice some volunteer roles are a lot more demanding these days. Keep a lookout and eventually one may come along that work for you.