It’s been ages since I last saw ep 1 and, while looking for the despecialized original trilogy, I came across the prequel fan edits. “Eh, why not?”

Gotta say, I was expecting the pacing or the story to kinda fall flat, but this was a very enjoyable watch. There’s a lot that was cut, nearly all the “whimsy” was removed, also the whole underwater trip when the jedis first land on Naboo. This leads to the Gungan alliance being a “jar jar ex machina”, but it worked well enough in my opinion. Other than that, I think the movie works really well in every aspect.

The torrent I got also comes with a .docx that lists the whole movie script with all the stuff that was cut in red, and new additions (very few) in blue. A smaller list of changes can be read here - Besides removing a lot of jar jar’s antics and any references to midichlorians (I personally never cared about that), one notable change near the end was making Anakin blow up the command ship before Padme and her group capture the Viceroy, so it makes it seem that the droids being deactivated is what allowed them to complete their objective.

One thing that I noticed during the final battle was that the Trade Federation pretty much dropped the blockade, as they only left one command ship in orbit, compared to the dozens at the beginning of the movie. I guess that was because the land invasion worked, so there was no further need to keep the orbital blockade.

PS: I couldn’t stop laughing when Obi Wan fell because of that fucking meme

PPS: I always liked how Naboo looks, but this time I really paused to look a bit better at the architecture, and it has such a nice mix of mediterranean marble of yellowish tones and cyan roofs. With the current image quality and all, it was much easier to pick out “ancient CG” and in many places it looked like a “old last gen game”, but it had that late 90s charm that warms my hearth with nostalgia.

PPPS: The worst part about watching SW as an older person is seeing all those damn walkways without a single guardrail anywhere. Coruscant is even worse, that transport vehicle full of VIP heading to the senate is fully open without so much as seatbelts.

  • Varyk
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    5 months ago

    PART 5 of 5

    -----In Shakespeare’s TPM, a parody of TPM, Jar Jar’s “devious” nature is written about as similar to a Sith lord.

    Argument: Binks has ulterior motives to his actions the parody, so in the real movies he is a Sith.

    Counter:

    1. Jar Jar is explicitly described in the cast list of STPM as “a Gungan clown”. Palpatine is listed as “Senator Palpatine/Darth Sidious”. If Binks had a second personality, it would be listed here. It is not.

    2. The “ulterior motives” alluded to in this theory refer to the Shakespearean tendency to speak all of their thoughts aloud. The connotation does not necessitate evil or harmful intent, but rather as a clear explanation of a character’s actions.

    3. The first “ulterior motive” of Jar Jar is to act foolishly in front of Jinn so that Jinn will be inserted into the Gungan tragedy and help the Gungans and Naboo eventually unite. Binks’ first “ulterior motive” is explicitly altruistic and harmonious, and he mentions that the Jedi can specifically help Binks achieve this dream of saving the Gungans as he cannot do so himself:

    “Belike this man[Jinn] brings aid unto Naboo
    Such as will help my people and my land.
    Mayhap this is the chance I have desir’d!”

    1. STPM follows the Shakespearean convention of the fool(the Gungan clown) always understanding the world better than those deemed better than themselves, so this ulterior motive of wanting to unite the Gungan and Naboo is immediately obvious to the Shakespearean fool, and then the other, more respectable main characters will come to realize its significance later.

    2. This is a LucasFilms sanctioned retelling of the Phantom Menace, so it’s the first time we can see directly inside Binks’ thought process in a work connected directly to LucasFilms. What we see is exactly what he appears to be. A bumbling fool with noble intentions.

    This argument is mischaracterizing altruistic exposition as “ulterior motives” that are explicitly pure, altruistic and respectful of Jedi in this retelling and expansion of SPTM.

    No Sith-ness here

    -----Jar Jar uses force jump again.

    Argument: Jar jar drops down from a different place than where he climbed over a wall.

    Counterargument: there’s no force jump here. Binks could have easily swung over to where he drops down so that the droid guard aiming at him misses where he was hanging off the wall.


    Taken altogether, most of this evidence is a non-starter. Rickety mountains of tenuous assumptions or circular logic. There is scrutiny of a word or behavior that does not actually occur in a referenced scene or example. Of the “clues” we can examine, none of it offers a more compelling reason for the actions of Jar Jar Binks, and much of it contradicts itself.

    Most of these Binks behaviors people attempt to describe as Sith talents indicating Binks’ force ability are performed publicly by Binks without compulsion, contradicting the idea of a hidden Sith.

    I’m well aware these are not all the arguments for Darth Binks, and am ready and willing to go into the rest.

    Thanks, this was fun.