• Apytele
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    4 hours ago

    Idk that I really do small talk OR do philosophical conversations with my partner but I’ll let you judge. Here’s the sort of things me and my partner say to each other throughout the day:

    • wanna play [whatever co-op we’re into lately]? (Then several hours of strategy discussions)
    • did you eat all the chips again you FUCKER followed by BITCH WHAT IF I DID YOU ATE ALL THE OREOS???
    • If all dogs go to heaven do their people have to be there for it to be a dog heaven and does that mean hitler is in heaven because he had a dog?
    • miscellaneous bitching about our jobs
    • wanna fuck
    • the dog pissed in the elevator again it’s your turn to go clean it
    • did you see the sweater I put the cat in?
    • Debates about whether or not a taco is a hot dog or vice versa
    • how many toys do you wanna get out for the fucking and more importantly how many are you willing to clean
    • that book you made me read is really melodramatic but I agree it’s about black mold.
    • we should go visit the hot tub vs no it’s too fucking cold vs that is the point of it being a HOT tub
    • wanna play cards against humanity with the cat
    • debates about who will hold the cat while we trim her claws
    • yelling at each other for being too loud while the other is sleeping and which offense is fundamentally more heinous (dayshifter vs nightshifter)
    • discussing the biopunk visuals in lexx and how they would have made all the butthole windows out of fabric
    • random nonsense words and noises like doing an entire karaoke bit but all the words are “doodoodoodoo doodley dooooot doo”
    • discussions about farscape’s costuming department’s extensive use of bondage gear
    • putting peanut butter on TOP of the dog’s snout then filming her
    • what if we feel like we’re seeing God when we’re on mushrooms because the mushrooms ARE god and we’re all just fundamentally here to feed them
    • blaming each other for the peanut butter thing to get the other person to clean it up
    • talking about weird internet personalities like chrischan or the tile patterns guy
    • calling each other old for stuff like heartburn after pizza or chronic injuries flaring up with the weather