• fsxylo
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    47
    arrow-down
    11
    ·
    7 months ago

    They used to just be on the Internet, but that brainrot is reaching gen z. Half of my younger female coworkers openly talk shit about men.(then pull the “oh I don’t mean you” card when I give them the side eye. Like that’s less offensive)

    • Sibelius Ginsterberg@feddit.de
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      21
      arrow-down
      11
      ·
      edit-2
      7 months ago

      If the possibility that a man will treat a woman badly (everything between belittling and straight up murder) is high enough, it is a life insurance to expect every man to be dangerous until proven otherwise. Its the same logic as “don’t talk to cops”.

      I’ve seen other men giving me answers to questions my wife asked to many times. Of course thats not dangerous, but thats still asshole-behaviour and you can recognise a whole lot of this behaviour everyday, if you just listen to your female coworkers instead of giving them the side eye. They probably wouldn’t feel the need to “not-you” you, if they KNEW you are not a possible asshole.

      • ashenblood
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        24
        arrow-down
        6
        ·
        edit-2
        7 months ago

        If the possibility that a man will treat a woman badly (everything between belittling and straight up murder) is high enough, it is a life insurance to expect every man to be dangerous until proven otherwise. Its the same logic as “don’t talk to cops”.

        No, it’s not life insurance. It’s pathological paranoia that doesn’t effectively improve one’s safety. If you go through life with an incredibly simplistic model of judgement, where any interaction with men or cops is dangerous until proven otherwise, you are simply trading one set of risks for another. There are many situations where a certain cop or man could be in a position to help or protect you, and you might fail to recognize that.

        If you’re not making any distinction between “belittling and straight up murder”, then you’re really just handicapping your ability to distinguish people who are actually violently dangerous from people who are just normal people. Most people act like assholes on a regular basis, but that doesn’t make them dangerous.

          • ashenblood
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            2
            ·
            7 months ago

            You’re implying that the social environment that I was born into is dysfunctional, and also completely disregarding the substance of my comment. In other words, you’re being a condescending prick. Case in point.

            It’s nearly impossible to be sympathetic and polite to every single person you encounter. Especially due to the state of the world today.

            • punkisundead [they/them]@slrpnk.net
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              2
              ·
              7 months ago

              You’re implying that the social environment that I was born into is dysfunctional,

              arent you saying that yourself?

              It’s nearly impossible to be sympathetic and polite to every single person you encounter. Especially due to the state of the world today

              And to the point of your other comment: It actually is dangerous to encounter to constantly encounter people that act like assholes because of your identity. This shit can be traumatic and I dont think its useful to call that not dangerous.

              • ashenblood
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                1
                ·
                7 months ago

                It actually is dangerous to encounter to constantly encounter people that act like assholes because of your identity. This shit can be traumatic and I dont think its useful to call that not dangerous.

                So, based on your own logic.

                By encouraging women to treat all men as potential deviants, you encourage them to act like assholes toward men because of their identity. This traumatizes men, thus creating more misanthropes who may potentially harm other people in the future.

                I don’t think I was implying anything negative about you, but if I was then I apologize.

                • punkisundead [they/them]@slrpnk.net
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  ·
                  7 months ago

                  Treating all men as potentially dangerous and being an active asshole to them is not the same. You can be careful without being an asshole and tbh in most situations its actually safer to do so. You can also vent about your experiences with men in a way that doesnt create an unpleasant situation for those around you.

                  I also think its not as direct as you make it out. To go from mistreatment of oneself to mistreating others is a big and not necessarily logical step. I think lots of other factors are at play, many that often get summarized under the term “toxic masculinity”.

      • ryathal
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        19
        arrow-down
        4
        ·
        7 months ago

        The fear of men is vastly over exaggerated. Men are still far more likely to be assaulted or murdered than women. Even when women are attacked, it’s rarely a stranger.

      • mindbleach
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        7 months ago

        The funniest form of this rampant underlying bigotry is transdudes recognizing something got easier because they pass.

    • Bobmighty@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      17
      arrow-down
      12
      ·
      7 months ago

      Tons of men I’ve known endlessly talk shit about women. It’s a standard feature of our species to talk shit about the opposite gender. It’s a standard of our species to talk shit in general really.

      • Hacksaw@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        22
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        7 months ago

        Talking shit about a person is one thing, grouping people into categories and denigrating or dehumanizing the whole category is another.

        I’m not saying either are good, but the whole grouping people and creating an us vs them attitude is very harmful to society. Much more than talking shit about Joe because he’s being a dick. There are very few situations where it’s useful such as when one group by its definition harms the other, such as slave owners, corporate executives with a fiduciary duty for profit over employees and customers, etc… In any situation where there is nuance it’s best to avoid making groups.

        Hate misandry or misogyny without projecting it as a feature common to all men or women or feminists even if you feel a large portion of them exhibit that feature.

      • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        7 months ago

        Tons of men I’ve known endlessly talk shit about women.

        Which is also fucking gross and shouldn’t be tolerated.