• @[email protected]
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    19210 days ago

    Well, he aced lesson one on how to get a job: don’t masturbate during the interview (unless that’s something you and the interviewer have agreed upon ahead of time for some reason)

    • Seraph
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      10 days ago

      You mean: be willing to work for minimum wage and actually capable of holding a conversation, even if awkward.

    • @[email protected]
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      3010 days ago

      Yeah I was just waiting for that to happen, esp with the sweaty outfit, I was expecting a new kink unlock experience. Or on the job, or when locking up…

    • @fibojoly
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      9110 days ago

      Well yeah, it’s a slice of life, not the Hero’s Journey.

    • Instigate
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      3610 days ago

      One of the more believable greentexts I’ve read, and likely for this reason.

    • @festnt
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      1910 days ago

      yeah, stories dont walk, duh

  • @[email protected]
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    10 days ago

    There are jobs and there are jobs. But well, some are born as cashier, I guess. What do I know. Give it a few more years of doing the same boring repetition over and over, for little to no pay.

    • Flax
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      119 days ago

      It’s a good starting point though. Sometimes you just need something to give yourself some momentum to get going with work

    • Anas
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      59 days ago

      because what he was doing before is way better, right?

      • @[email protected]
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        19 days ago

        My biggest takeaway from this green text is go to Long John silver’s to be greeted by a fapaholic and just look at his hands and look in his eyes and picture him being a fapaholic while he’s handling your cash and he’s got his hands all over that cash register and he hands you your paper bag full of greasy food.

  • @[email protected]
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    3710 days ago

    Hell yeah bro, get locked in for that corporate grind. Getting those positive vibes out, absolutely hammering those orders, and staying locked in.

    • @[email protected]
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      129 days ago

      When you’re young and need money, a dead-end job is better than no job. Fund your search for higher sights to set

        • @[email protected]
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          9 days ago

          Nah, trust fund babies exist, and old people may actually have worse outcomes from working a labor-intensive job just to pay bills

          • @[email protected]
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            29 days ago

            old people was my point, it’s not limited to youth who need money, our society takes the elderly and jerks them around into the labor force.

      • @[email protected]
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        49 days ago

        The tragic part of spending all one’s time & energy in a dead end job, just to barely financially survive, it kinda drains you (physically, mentally, emotionally, morale, creatively, sucks out all your life force) and that’s where the tragic dead end truly begins.

  • @[email protected]
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    189 days ago

    This sounds like it’s written by someone that’s not 18 currently. Posting on 4chan but not applying online? Biking for applications in person sounds like some old people thing back in the day.

  • FreshLight
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    169 days ago

    Well… I’ll never get the time back I wasted on reading this super boring and pointless story

  • @[email protected]
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    -3210 days ago

    extremely religious so I know I shouldn’t be fapping at all.

    Correlation does not equal causation. Being religious doesn’t cause the belief that fapping is wrong. Being Christian causes it. Being Christian also causes being religious, but not the other way around. So it’s a common cause leading to correlation, not an actual causal relationship. And it isn’t a logical deduction either.

    OP should have been studying philosophy instead of fapping, maybe then he wouldn’t make logical mistakes which inadvertently erase the diversity of religious experiences.

    • @[email protected]
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      4610 days ago

      I know you’re all excited because you just understood the “correlation does not equal causation” principle, but “being religious” generally means being christian in english and I think you are just refusing to see that.

      • @[email protected]
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        10 days ago

        The only reason for that is the many genocides perpetrated against members of other religions. Especially in places like Australia and the Americas where Christians were bloodthirsty invaders. By equating the two, all you’re doing is continuing the work of conquistadores and other murderous colonisers. It’s factually wrong, but more importantly, it’s morally wrong. There’s no reason to act this disgracefully.

        • @the_crotch
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          2210 days ago

          Europeans regularly killed other Europeans, who were Christian. The natives could have met them at the shore with a stack of bibles and the colonizers still would have slaughtered them.

          • @[email protected]
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            -1710 days ago

            It sounds like you’re saying religious genocide doesn’t matter because it would have happened anyway.

            • @the_crotch
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              10 days ago

              I’m saying it was European colonial genocide, religion was a secondary or tertiary motivation, and yes it would have happened anyway

              • @[email protected]
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                -1110 days ago

                I don’t care about motivation or how a bunch of murderers felt, I care about the victims of genocide and the loss of massive religious diversity. Don’t you care about that too? Or is the only thing that matters to you what the conquistadores “intended” while they were raping girls and destroying villages?

                • @the_crotch
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                  1010 days ago

                  I don’t care about motivation

                  Really? This you?

                  The only reason for that is the many genocides perpetrated against members of other religions. Especially in places like Australia and the Americas where Christians were bloodthirsty invaders.

    • @[email protected]
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      9 days ago

      You’re confusing correlation does not equal causation with some other logical fallacy, and making a few others in the process. Probably denying the antecedent, but I can’t be arsed to look up the specific one.

      If you think Christianity is uniquely bad that’s probably because you haven’t learned enough about other religions.

    • Turun
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      310 days ago

      Ok, which religion is masturbation positive though? Islam, Judaism, Buddism, … ?

      • @[email protected]
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        510 days ago

        Many Protestant churches in Northern and Western Europe and some Protestant churches in Northern America and in Australia/New Zealand see masturbation as not a sin.

        Hinduism: Seeking bodily pleasure is only considered condemned for those who dedicate themselves to chastity. There are no references in Hindu religious texts to suggest that masturbation itself desecrates sexual purity. For those who are dedicated to chastity, this sin is absolutely minor, and can be absolved either by taking a bath, or by worshipping the Sun, or by saying three prayers.

        Buddhism: The most used formulation of Buddhist ethics are the Five Precepts. These precepts take the form of voluntary personal undertakings, not divine mandate or instruction. The third precept is “to refrain from committing sexual misconduct”.[220] However, different schools of Buddhism have differing interpretations of what constitutes sexual misconduct.

        Wicca, like other religions, has adherents with a spectrum of views ranging from conservative to liberal. Wicca is generally undogmatic, and nothing in Wiccan philosophy prohibits masturbation. On the contrary, Wiccan ethics, summed up in the Wiccan Rede “An it harm none, do as thou wilt”, are interpreted by many as endorsing responsible sexual activity of all varieties. This is reinforced in the Charge of the Goddess, a key piece of Wiccan literature, in which the Goddess says, “all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals”.[235]

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_views_on_masturbation

        This is a tiny fraction of the religions that sometimes or always allow masturbation. I’m not seeing any indigenous American, Australian, or Austronesian religions in this article.

        • Turun
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          9 days ago

          TIL, thanks for the link and excerpt.

          • @[email protected]
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            29 days ago

            Thanks for keeping an open mind. A lot of people are taught from childhood that Abrahamism is representative of all religion, and they stick to that even when the truth is in front of their face. This state of affairs was manufactured, it didn’t used to be like this. People used to be a lot more accepting of religions they didn’t understand. In fact, before the Roman Empire, most people believed in the gods of every religion, and that was normal. And I can also assure you the ancient Greeks didn’t have Christian reservations about sexual pleasure. They had their own set of rules, but it was a different set.

      • BrerChicken
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        19 days ago

        Unitarian-Universalists don’t have a problem at all with masturbation, and they encourage you to explore and accept your body. That sounds pretty masturbation positive to me!