My family makes no bones about talking about weight loss and gain in unhealthy ways. I love seeing people but I am totally dreading this year.
I never expected sustained weight loss would make me feel so weird about being thinner. I find myself in the trap of thinking everything will be great if I’m skinny. Instead I feel embarrassed. What the hell?
I recently saw my hairdresser after three months and 20 pounds. She noticed but said nothing so I just ripped the seal off and we talked about it a lot. She is a safe person who I know won’t say hurtful stuff. I wish I could say the same about my family.
**edit - I forgot I originally posted this from my lemmy.world account and then answered from my lemm.ee account. I’m fired.
The snark you may receive from those jealous is astounding! I definitely got ‘are you dying’ and ‘well your not as fat but still…’ among other drivel. honestly, fuckem. Be proud of your achievement, you do this for you, not them or their approval. They’ll say hurtful things cos they are nasty, keep your chin up, think of some tart responses if you like, but mainly I’d say brush those comments off like you brushed off the weight. Enjoy the cake in moderation and keep on doing what you do
This is exactly the kind of snark I’m expecting.
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Sorry to hear it, congrats on the weight loss tho, try and focus on that positive. It probably depends on the group but you could try and talk to people individually beforehand so it’s not a big surprise with the whole group on the day of. And just be honest with them try and set some boundaries.
I’ve been tossing the idea around. I already told my cool family.
You may not be aware, but it’s okay to just walk away.
Doesn’t matter if it’s family, if there are people in a place, you can just get up and leave. You don’t even have to say anything, you can just go.
It’s up to each of us as individuals whether or not we want to, but the obligations of family do not extend to accepting an unhealthy environment.
Doesn’t matter if it’s family, if there are people in a place, you can just get up and leave. You don’t even have to say anything, you can just go.
I did exactly this a couple of years ago during Thanksgiving dinner. Family wouldn’t let politics drop, my wife and I were the only progressive minds at the table and she’s such a peacemaker that she spent most of her time refereeing and she was hurting more than helping. I felt cornered (literally sitting in the corner of the room).
After asking that we drop politics three times I finally got up, put my dog’s leash on him, and left.
The family (my wife included) thought I was just taking a walk. But I had no intention of coming back. I set off walking to my wife’s aunt and uncle’s house a few miles away, where we were planning to go later in the evening anyway. Eventually my wife picked me up along the route and we continued together.
The family doesn’t talk about politics when we’re all together now.
The situation sucks but I like this response.
If you could bring a friend or tell a family member that might make less of a big deal about it, it’s a lot easier to deal with that kinda stuff if you have someone you can complain about it with, and also leave with them or by yourself for a bit if you need it.
Luckily I’ll have my partner with me.
